I've been reading Genesis this week... People always say you can't exhaust God's Word and I believe that. Now though I'm starting to understand that it's really because we are ever changing... therefore you never read the same thing the same way.
Take the great love story of Isaac and Rebekah The first time I read this story I was a brand new Christian at the ripe young age of 19. To me at that point in my life this was the most inspirational love story in the Bible. I focused in on the parts of God leading Abraham's servant right to the "the right woman" and it all played out so perfectly. I was inspired by the love at first sight, dreamy feel of Rebekah's first meeting with Isaac and I just knew it was "Happy Ever After".
As a baby Christian at the age of 19 this story had captured my fancy... God was gonna work it all out. I was a new creation... My life from this point on would be cloudless days, filled with rainbows and I would meet the "right" one, and we would be perfect together and we would be perfect parents and because we followed Jesus EVERYTHING would be PERFECT... Idealistic, but true nonetheless. Maybe it's youth that makes us dream such impossible dreams.
17 years later I read this story so differently... I bet Rebekah didn't expect things to turn out the way they do. I bet when she was swept up onto that camel, rescued from her father's house, and delivered straight into the arms of Mr. Right, she was thinking this is the beginning of the rest of my life. I bet she had a vision of perfection in mind.
Maybe it's my experience that makes me think she was SHOCKED with reality. Was she confused and upset with 20 years of barrenness. In a culture where children were highly prized and the most important reason for marriage I imagine that she was NOT expecting to have any trouble producing a child. THIS IS NOT WHAT SHE EXPECTED.
After her husband pleaded with the Lord (lesson 1... hardship draws us to the Lord), she became pregnant, but we know that this pregnancy didn't go the way she expected. Again we see a situation that draws her to the Lord. She goes to Him to find out what is going on.
Rebekah that young idealist is learning that the harsh realities of life make us draw near to a loving God.
I bet Rebekah didn't expect to behave so imperfectly... I know I didn't. She probably expected Mr. Right to always do and say the right thing. She probably expected Mr. and Mrs. Right to bear perfectly delightful children... but as the story goes this didn't happen. In fact the legacy of the patriarch's family is filled with people behaving badly. Not at all what you would expect to find in God's chosen family...
The problems in her family are enough to break any mom's heart. We could just inject in this story our own story, because I''m sure we can all relate. This is not at all what we expected. At one point Rebekah even tell Isaac that "I am weary of my life." Have you ever been there? Has life turned out less perfect than you thought it would?
What can I learn from Rebekah's life? ALOT. First and foremost the story is not about Mr. or Mrs. Right. The story is not about them at all. Mr. and Mrs. Right don't exist. The story is about the graciousness of a PERFECT God who chooses a regular family to bring forth His son so that we can be saved from our sins.
Secondly, I can see from Rebekah's life that LIFE IS NOT PERFECT. Life is HARD, life is painful, and life can make you weary. The weariness of life can be just the thing that draws us into a deeper relationship with God. Our faults, failures and weakness are the perfect backdrop to see God's AMAZING GRACE.
The failure of others (husbands and children) to meet our expectations of perfection can be just the thing that highlights our need for a relationship with a loving, perfect God, who will never leave us or forsake us.
Finally, this story is our story because life was never meant to be perfect. This place is not our home. The struggles of life serve as a constant reminder that Jesus is preparing a place for us. THAT place is the place of NO MORE tears, NO MORE dying, NO MORE pain. That place where God will be our God and HE will dwell with us is where our affection should be.
This life has moments of pure perfection... but they are fleeting. This life has joy, but NOTHING in this life can compare to what He has planned for those who love him.
This story has become for me a reminder that sometimes life is painful, BUT God is for me. It reminds me that I am NOT perfect and that's not why God chose me. My husband is not perfect, my children are not perfect. This story reminds me that in spite of all that God loves me and went to extraordinary lengths to show HIS great love for ordinary, messed up, always doing the wrong thing people!!! OH what Good news that is, because I could NEVER live up to the life I did expect.
Showing posts with label Working on me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Working on me. Show all posts
Sunday, January 12, 2014
Friday, May 3, 2013
His Workmanship.
"For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God
prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." Eph 2:10.
The past few weeks have been rough. I have been on the couch with incredible fatigue. That means no cooking, no cleaning, no going out. There have been times when I would get discouraged by my physical situation, but I have tried most of the time to be joyful. I know that God did not make this happen... my poor choices over the years have led up to my body needing a break, but I do believe that God uses ALL things for our good. Sitting on the couch or laying in the bed has given me some time to think. The Father has given me so much to think about. I can see alot of things that I couldn't see when I was busy bee. Actually right now my thoughts are all in a jumble about what God is showing me, but I will try to narrow a couple down for this post.
I was redeemed in 1996 and not having ever had anything to do with church before I had no idea that this journey to holiness was going to be so long and drawn out. I also naturally assumed that God would clean up my outside up real quick like and that would be the end of it, on to live the GOOD LIFE. This kind of thinking coupled with NO discipleship eventually landed me right back where I was before and worse. Until on a day 4 years later when the Spirit spoke to my heart and said "I can change you. My word has to be the food you eat and the water you drink." I began to devour His Word and through the years I have been CHANGED, but I really didn't understand the depth of what God wanted to do in my life. I just thought I was finally going to be a better person. When the bible says "He will complete the work he started in You" I had no idea that this was going to be a life long work and surely wouldn't he be better served to do it all at once?!?! ;-)
Fast-forward to now. I am a wife, a mom of 4, baby on the way, homeschooling, woman of God (used lightly). When I say "woman of God" in my mind I'm wanting to be absolutely EVERYTHING that I read in scripture... Hospitality, Good works, feeding the poor, and so on, but I can barely feed the children God's blessed me with, and keep the house from looking like one you would see on hoarders, and educate them in a 1/2 way decent way. I often feel guilty of not adding up. I stress alot about what "other" people think about me. I feel guilty about what I'm not able to accomplish and compare myself to every other woman I see and in my mind don't measure up.
Naturally my first reaction to being struck down by some mysterious ailment was FEAR... How can I get things done. FEAR... what will everybody else think. FEAR... I can't keep up as it is. FEAR, FEAR, FEAR... One of the first things the Lord highlighted was this FEAR and that the driving force of my life is to prove my worth. I've been striving all these years to prove my worth to God, to my husband, and everyone around me. When you're fearful you cannot rest in the Love of God. For a moment in time the Lord has "layed me down" to show me that NOTHING I do can make Him love me. He is LOVE. I could do everything or nothing and His love wouldn't change. His love is not based on me being and doing. Actually HE proved his love in that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. When I was completely unlovable HE LOVED ME.
Along with the love of God, the love of my husband is nothing I've earned. Because of Christ the love between us is not about what I do or anything else. Actually I have seen the love of my husband much more clearly when I was down. His care and concern were beautiful to me. Like a healing balm on my soul.
One of the things I worry about is keeping up... I remember all the events where I should have taken a break and let someone else do things for me and I didn't. The times I should have been on bed rest and didn't rest. After babies were born and even now during pregnancy when I REALLY NEED a nap, but I keep going because I'm so afraid of falling behind. OR even worse I want to prove to everyone that I don't need help... FEAR AGAIN. These 2 weeks have really shown me how silly that is. My husband and my children have stepped up to help in so many ways. I can rest AND I CAN ASK FOR HELP. How freeing.
I was blown away to read Psalms 23 with new eyes through this...
The Lord is my Shepherd,
I shall not want,
HE MAKES ME TO LIE DOWN IN GREEN PASTURES,
He leads me beside the still waters,
HE RESTORES MY SOUL.
I feel like He has LAYED me down physically so that I could find rest in Him. Yes my body needs rest and I need to take care of myself by eating right. More importantly though my soul needed some RESTORING.
My mom passing last year was a blow. I guess I thought that since I was a child of God and that I know heaven is better than here I didn't allow myself to grieve properly. I thought that I didn't have time to be down. I thought that the long illness had prepared me for her passing, but I see now that my soul needed some restoring. I see that I needed to REST in God. I see now that HE sometimes has to make us lay down so that we will have the time to focus.
I'm so thankful that God layed me down. I feel like we worked on somethings that are going to help me. We are created to be HIS workmanship, but we can do very little good when we work ourselves to death, when we are tired and grumpy, or even doing things with wrong motives. Sometimes we are actually the ones who NEED someone to care for us and minister to us. I've been reading several books lately and one thing I noticed is that men and woman of God who are DRIVEN to do mighty things for Jesus usually by divine Providence have times when they are layed down... It makes me think of David and his desire to build the Temple (for) God, and God saying NO. We should NEVER FORGET that we are NOT making a name for ourselves. We are making a name for God AND sometimes that means decreasing to the point NOT being seen. HE works in ways that we don't understand. Like sickness, early death, pain, suffering... A post for another time. It's RARELY the GREAT things that we do that make the most impact on the lives around us.
This is a small account of what the Lord has begun to show me. I know I didn't really get it all, but if I know anything about the Lord it's this... before it's over I will learn these lessons thoroughly!!! I'm thankful to be up again, but I have to say that being down on that green grass sitting with my Shepherd was a sweet time. I'm thankful for His constant care for me.
The past few weeks have been rough. I have been on the couch with incredible fatigue. That means no cooking, no cleaning, no going out. There have been times when I would get discouraged by my physical situation, but I have tried most of the time to be joyful. I know that God did not make this happen... my poor choices over the years have led up to my body needing a break, but I do believe that God uses ALL things for our good. Sitting on the couch or laying in the bed has given me some time to think. The Father has given me so much to think about. I can see alot of things that I couldn't see when I was busy bee. Actually right now my thoughts are all in a jumble about what God is showing me, but I will try to narrow a couple down for this post.
I was redeemed in 1996 and not having ever had anything to do with church before I had no idea that this journey to holiness was going to be so long and drawn out. I also naturally assumed that God would clean up my outside up real quick like and that would be the end of it, on to live the GOOD LIFE. This kind of thinking coupled with NO discipleship eventually landed me right back where I was before and worse. Until on a day 4 years later when the Spirit spoke to my heart and said "I can change you. My word has to be the food you eat and the water you drink." I began to devour His Word and through the years I have been CHANGED, but I really didn't understand the depth of what God wanted to do in my life. I just thought I was finally going to be a better person. When the bible says "He will complete the work he started in You" I had no idea that this was going to be a life long work and surely wouldn't he be better served to do it all at once?!?! ;-)
Fast-forward to now. I am a wife, a mom of 4, baby on the way, homeschooling, woman of God (used lightly). When I say "woman of God" in my mind I'm wanting to be absolutely EVERYTHING that I read in scripture... Hospitality, Good works, feeding the poor, and so on, but I can barely feed the children God's blessed me with, and keep the house from looking like one you would see on hoarders, and educate them in a 1/2 way decent way. I often feel guilty of not adding up. I stress alot about what "other" people think about me. I feel guilty about what I'm not able to accomplish and compare myself to every other woman I see and in my mind don't measure up.
Naturally my first reaction to being struck down by some mysterious ailment was FEAR... How can I get things done. FEAR... what will everybody else think. FEAR... I can't keep up as it is. FEAR, FEAR, FEAR... One of the first things the Lord highlighted was this FEAR and that the driving force of my life is to prove my worth. I've been striving all these years to prove my worth to God, to my husband, and everyone around me. When you're fearful you cannot rest in the Love of God. For a moment in time the Lord has "layed me down" to show me that NOTHING I do can make Him love me. He is LOVE. I could do everything or nothing and His love wouldn't change. His love is not based on me being and doing. Actually HE proved his love in that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. When I was completely unlovable HE LOVED ME.
Along with the love of God, the love of my husband is nothing I've earned. Because of Christ the love between us is not about what I do or anything else. Actually I have seen the love of my husband much more clearly when I was down. His care and concern were beautiful to me. Like a healing balm on my soul.
One of the things I worry about is keeping up... I remember all the events where I should have taken a break and let someone else do things for me and I didn't. The times I should have been on bed rest and didn't rest. After babies were born and even now during pregnancy when I REALLY NEED a nap, but I keep going because I'm so afraid of falling behind. OR even worse I want to prove to everyone that I don't need help... FEAR AGAIN. These 2 weeks have really shown me how silly that is. My husband and my children have stepped up to help in so many ways. I can rest AND I CAN ASK FOR HELP. How freeing.
I was blown away to read Psalms 23 with new eyes through this...
The Lord is my Shepherd,
I shall not want,
HE MAKES ME TO LIE DOWN IN GREEN PASTURES,
He leads me beside the still waters,
HE RESTORES MY SOUL.
I feel like He has LAYED me down physically so that I could find rest in Him. Yes my body needs rest and I need to take care of myself by eating right. More importantly though my soul needed some RESTORING.
My mom passing last year was a blow. I guess I thought that since I was a child of God and that I know heaven is better than here I didn't allow myself to grieve properly. I thought that I didn't have time to be down. I thought that the long illness had prepared me for her passing, but I see now that my soul needed some restoring. I see that I needed to REST in God. I see now that HE sometimes has to make us lay down so that we will have the time to focus.
I'm so thankful that God layed me down. I feel like we worked on somethings that are going to help me. We are created to be HIS workmanship, but we can do very little good when we work ourselves to death, when we are tired and grumpy, or even doing things with wrong motives. Sometimes we are actually the ones who NEED someone to care for us and minister to us. I've been reading several books lately and one thing I noticed is that men and woman of God who are DRIVEN to do mighty things for Jesus usually by divine Providence have times when they are layed down... It makes me think of David and his desire to build the Temple (for) God, and God saying NO. We should NEVER FORGET that we are NOT making a name for ourselves. We are making a name for God AND sometimes that means decreasing to the point NOT being seen. HE works in ways that we don't understand. Like sickness, early death, pain, suffering... A post for another time. It's RARELY the GREAT things that we do that make the most impact on the lives around us.
This is a small account of what the Lord has begun to show me. I know I didn't really get it all, but if I know anything about the Lord it's this... before it's over I will learn these lessons thoroughly!!! I'm thankful to be up again, but I have to say that being down on that green grass sitting with my Shepherd was a sweet time. I'm thankful for His constant care for me.
Monday, May 14, 2012
From Devoted to Diva...
"Five Habits Every Mom Should Break" was the name of an article I read recently written by a well meaning Mom I'm sure. It had some pretty good tips, but the very last one really frustrated me. #5 Stop Putting Yourself Last... I don't know if this article was written by a christian so I will give her a break, but the problem I have is that I hear statements like that ALL THE TIME from everywhere, and most of the time I hear it coming from me... It sounds so good... They always start out with the ego rub...
"You work so hard doing so much for everyone else."
"If you focus on you and put yourself first you will have more to give to your family."
"You need ME TIME."
The problem you ask??? Isn't it true? Won't we be happier, better, more loving Mothers IF we spend time on ourselves and take a break? Isn't this idea of ME TIME a good one?
Well, I guess it might be for you... BUT, I have found that ME TIME can become a monster!!! It takes 5 minutes to change me from a Devoted mom and wife, to a DIVA. You know what Diva's do... Everyone has to serve them. They want things their way. The world revolves around the Diva. She becomes the most important person. Who said one person in the family should be most important?
Me time starts so innocently, but sooner than later Me time becomes a commanding force demanding that you have Me time more and more. Like a drug that changes your personality and demands that you seek more and more for a high. Anyone who gets in the way of Me time becomes the enemy. Husbands and children become burdens to bear instead of the blessings they were intended to be. Pretty soon you would do ANYTHING to get away from them for a while.
I know what you're thinking right about now. You think I am saying you should never ever do anything for yourself. You're thinking I think we should Cinderella's never going to the ball. I'm not. I'm saying seeking Me time for the sake of Me is so very dangerous. I'm saying that you can go to the gym if you want (to be healthy). I'm saying you can read a good book if you want to. I'm saying you can go shopping with the girls to be with them. I'm saying go on a date with the hubs. I'm saying if Grandma calls and wants to pick up the kids and let you have a break DO IT!!! Just Don't get in the mind set THAT YOU MUST HAVE ME TIME!!! Don't PUT YOURSELF FIRST!!! It's a dangerous game. If EVERYONE is putting themselves first what is the eventual consequence... No one is looking out for the well-being of the family!!! And Ladies that IS our calling.
Our Example is Christ and what did He do? He laid down His life and He said "He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that looses his life shall find it." He said Die to yourself. He said love others more than yourself and LOVE is ONLY an action. Love puts others before themselves. That is why this idea is so dangerous because it opposite from what the Bible demands. Ours IS A LIFE of SERVICE!!! We are made in the image of God... givers of life in every way. We are a picture of the Holy Spirit in our home and His very definition is Helper and Comforter ever present and available to us.
I loved this morning as I was reading Genesis 18 the story of the 3 angels visiting Abraham. One of the visitors was Christ Himself and when He showed up Abraham begged him to stay and be refreshed at their tent... Then Abraham runs in the tent to find Sarah and tells her to prepare a meal for the UNEXPECTED visitors... He said "Make ready QUICKLY three measures of fine meal, knead it, and make cakes upon the hearth." then Abraham goes out and prepared the meat.
Since this whole idea of ME TIME was on my mind it struck that I'm so glad Sarah wasn't out getting her nails done when Jesus came along. I'm glad she wasn't out putting herself first because she would have missed out on a HUGE blessing. THE LORD came to visit her and she was there in her tent ready and willing to throw together a meal. She was there HELPING Abraham which I am SURE he was so very glad and thankful for his wife at that moment. Sarah was hidden away in her tent, but she was precisely where Jesus wanted her to be. Then she got the greatest news of all she was going to bear a son. What a blessing, better than any ME TIME!!!
So, Lord PLEASE help me become the Devoted wife and mother you want me to be and STOP striving to be a DIVA. YOU know what is best and you have your reasons I know. Help me lay my life down and take up my cross. Help me live as a living sacrifice for you!!!
"You work so hard doing so much for everyone else."
"If you focus on you and put yourself first you will have more to give to your family."
"You need ME TIME."
The problem you ask??? Isn't it true? Won't we be happier, better, more loving Mothers IF we spend time on ourselves and take a break? Isn't this idea of ME TIME a good one?
Well, I guess it might be for you... BUT, I have found that ME TIME can become a monster!!! It takes 5 minutes to change me from a Devoted mom and wife, to a DIVA. You know what Diva's do... Everyone has to serve them. They want things their way. The world revolves around the Diva. She becomes the most important person. Who said one person in the family should be most important?
Me time starts so innocently, but sooner than later Me time becomes a commanding force demanding that you have Me time more and more. Like a drug that changes your personality and demands that you seek more and more for a high. Anyone who gets in the way of Me time becomes the enemy. Husbands and children become burdens to bear instead of the blessings they were intended to be. Pretty soon you would do ANYTHING to get away from them for a while.
I know what you're thinking right about now. You think I am saying you should never ever do anything for yourself. You're thinking I think we should Cinderella's never going to the ball. I'm not. I'm saying seeking Me time for the sake of Me is so very dangerous. I'm saying that you can go to the gym if you want (to be healthy). I'm saying you can read a good book if you want to. I'm saying you can go shopping with the girls to be with them. I'm saying go on a date with the hubs. I'm saying if Grandma calls and wants to pick up the kids and let you have a break DO IT!!! Just Don't get in the mind set THAT YOU MUST HAVE ME TIME!!! Don't PUT YOURSELF FIRST!!! It's a dangerous game. If EVERYONE is putting themselves first what is the eventual consequence... No one is looking out for the well-being of the family!!! And Ladies that IS our calling.
Our Example is Christ and what did He do? He laid down His life and He said "He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that looses his life shall find it." He said Die to yourself. He said love others more than yourself and LOVE is ONLY an action. Love puts others before themselves. That is why this idea is so dangerous because it opposite from what the Bible demands. Ours IS A LIFE of SERVICE!!! We are made in the image of God... givers of life in every way. We are a picture of the Holy Spirit in our home and His very definition is Helper and Comforter ever present and available to us.
I loved this morning as I was reading Genesis 18 the story of the 3 angels visiting Abraham. One of the visitors was Christ Himself and when He showed up Abraham begged him to stay and be refreshed at their tent... Then Abraham runs in the tent to find Sarah and tells her to prepare a meal for the UNEXPECTED visitors... He said "Make ready QUICKLY three measures of fine meal, knead it, and make cakes upon the hearth." then Abraham goes out and prepared the meat.
Since this whole idea of ME TIME was on my mind it struck that I'm so glad Sarah wasn't out getting her nails done when Jesus came along. I'm glad she wasn't out putting herself first because she would have missed out on a HUGE blessing. THE LORD came to visit her and she was there in her tent ready and willing to throw together a meal. She was there HELPING Abraham which I am SURE he was so very glad and thankful for his wife at that moment. Sarah was hidden away in her tent, but she was precisely where Jesus wanted her to be. Then she got the greatest news of all she was going to bear a son. What a blessing, better than any ME TIME!!!
So, Lord PLEASE help me become the Devoted wife and mother you want me to be and STOP striving to be a DIVA. YOU know what is best and you have your reasons I know. Help me lay my life down and take up my cross. Help me live as a living sacrifice for you!!!
Friday, January 27, 2012
A time for everything...
"See, I have this day set you over the nations and over kingdoms, to root out, and to pull down, and to destroy, and to throw down, to build, and to plant." Jer 1:10
It seems that my life has been in disarray since the "holiday season". Between decorating, gift buying and wrapping,and parties... Undecorating, putting the house back together, reorganizing, and trying to get back to school... then sickness. I feel like my life is a total wreck... Not just my house, but my little guys are having discipline issues, I haven't been alone with the hubs since I can't remember when, and my friendships have been put on the back burner... I was feeling pretty sad for myself, and I emailed my HS group asking if anyone every had these times and if they felt as guilty as I do. In response I heard several woman say that January has been the same for them. Whew. Not the only one.
I began to think about some of the things that this time is teaching me. At the same time I read the verse above and it's been hanging in my mind for a couple days. Jeremiah's job was to root out, pull down, destroy and throw down AND then to build and plant.... Yes there are definitely things that need to be rooted out of my life. I see that now. Hard times expose those ugly things in my heart that I'm able to hide when everything is going my way. Paul says we must "lay down wrath, malice, anger..." Yeah those things need to be pulled down in my life and discomfort exposes this. Wrong motives that need to be thrown down. Wrong thinking and blind spots that have to be exposed. That's what this time has been about for me... pulling down, rooting out...
Praise God that He has two parts to this plan though... A time for building and planting. I just have to realize that the first part of the plan is equally as important as the second. You can't plant a new garden until you have gotten rid of last years leftovers. Digging and tilling come before planting and growing... I'm thankful that there is a time of building and planting and even though this takes hard work to it just seems more productive. There will be a time for healing, cleaning, learning, restoring friendships, and spending time with hubs... And I will savor all that because God has been doing a little work in my heart.
My ways are not his though... He is preparing me for a place of perfection and I need to let him expose and destroy these things in my heart that won't fit in there. Father, I pray that you would have the freedom to do whatever you desire to do in my life. I know you are completing the work you started in me. I know you are working everything for my good. I know you are teaching me the things I need to know. I am stubborn and stiff-necked person Lord and I thank you that you don't give up trying to teach me your ways...
It seems that my life has been in disarray since the "holiday season". Between decorating, gift buying and wrapping,and parties... Undecorating, putting the house back together, reorganizing, and trying to get back to school... then sickness. I feel like my life is a total wreck... Not just my house, but my little guys are having discipline issues, I haven't been alone with the hubs since I can't remember when, and my friendships have been put on the back burner... I was feeling pretty sad for myself, and I emailed my HS group asking if anyone every had these times and if they felt as guilty as I do. In response I heard several woman say that January has been the same for them. Whew. Not the only one.
I began to think about some of the things that this time is teaching me. At the same time I read the verse above and it's been hanging in my mind for a couple days. Jeremiah's job was to root out, pull down, destroy and throw down AND then to build and plant.... Yes there are definitely things that need to be rooted out of my life. I see that now. Hard times expose those ugly things in my heart that I'm able to hide when everything is going my way. Paul says we must "lay down wrath, malice, anger..." Yeah those things need to be pulled down in my life and discomfort exposes this. Wrong motives that need to be thrown down. Wrong thinking and blind spots that have to be exposed. That's what this time has been about for me... pulling down, rooting out...
Praise God that He has two parts to this plan though... A time for building and planting. I just have to realize that the first part of the plan is equally as important as the second. You can't plant a new garden until you have gotten rid of last years leftovers. Digging and tilling come before planting and growing... I'm thankful that there is a time of building and planting and even though this takes hard work to it just seems more productive. There will be a time for healing, cleaning, learning, restoring friendships, and spending time with hubs... And I will savor all that because God has been doing a little work in my heart.
My ways are not his though... He is preparing me for a place of perfection and I need to let him expose and destroy these things in my heart that won't fit in there. Father, I pray that you would have the freedom to do whatever you desire to do in my life. I know you are completing the work you started in me. I know you are working everything for my good. I know you are teaching me the things I need to know. I am stubborn and stiff-necked person Lord and I thank you that you don't give up trying to teach me your ways...
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Jeremiah can we talk awhile???
I know weird name for a post. I have been asked to speak for a ladies bible study get together. This used to be nothing for me. I was so young and dumb and confident in myself. Somewhere along the way on this journey with the Lord I've lost the confidence I once had. Oh, I know that the Lord will be there and he will speak the words he wants to say, he always does. WHICH I know is far more important than what I could say. It's just that in the last year the Lord has done somethings in my life that I know are of him and pleasing to him, but I feel isolated and different.
OH, how I HATE different. I didn't know that I hated different until I got there and started sticking out like a sore thumb. So, I want to retreat and hide away (like a lamp under a bushel). It's shameful for me to say, but I don't want to share what God has done, because I don't want to pass on this infection of different. ALAS, that is what God wants us to strive for right??? Different or a better word PECULIAR PEOPLE (1 peter 2:9).
In trying to find comfort for the illness you've received where do you look? Your inspiration JESUS and his words are "take comfort the world will hate you, because they first hated me." WHAT is this what I signed up for? YES... because counting my cost leaves me with two options fear God and follow Jesus or fear man and lose my soul. I can't go back to normal now!!!
I know this is all very down in the dumps and cryptic. Sorry about that! So, today I wish that I could sit down with Jeremiah. I know He had to feel this way.
"Before I formed you in the belly I knew you; and before you came forth out of the womb I sanctified you a prophet to the nations."
"Then I said, Ah, Lord God! behold I cannot speak: for I am a child."
"BUT the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for you shall go to all that I shall send you, and whatever I command you to say you shall speak."
"Be not afraid of their faces: for I AM with you to deliver you, saith the Lord."
"Then the Lord put forth his hand, and touched my mouth. And the Lord said unto me, BEHOLD, I have put my words in your mouth."
Jeremiah had a hard job to do as prophet for God. He had to tell the people what God had said and even battle lying prophets who said everything was going to be ok and that judgement was not coming upon the country. Who would want that job? Let's not forget though that even if everyone rejected him that didn't change the fact that He was CHOSEN by God and given a message to speak. I'm sure with a burning fire in his chest and sweaty palms he relayed the message of God. What did he do when his message was completely ignored and rejected? I don't know what did Jesus do?
I want to sit down and talk to him and ask him in the end was the rejection of this world worth it, BUT I know the answer already!!!
"
OH, how I HATE different. I didn't know that I hated different until I got there and started sticking out like a sore thumb. So, I want to retreat and hide away (like a lamp under a bushel). It's shameful for me to say, but I don't want to share what God has done, because I don't want to pass on this infection of different. ALAS, that is what God wants us to strive for right??? Different or a better word PECULIAR PEOPLE (1 peter 2:9).
In trying to find comfort for the illness you've received where do you look? Your inspiration JESUS and his words are "take comfort the world will hate you, because they first hated me." WHAT is this what I signed up for? YES... because counting my cost leaves me with two options fear God and follow Jesus or fear man and lose my soul. I can't go back to normal now!!!
I know this is all very down in the dumps and cryptic. Sorry about that! So, today I wish that I could sit down with Jeremiah. I know He had to feel this way.
"Before I formed you in the belly I knew you; and before you came forth out of the womb I sanctified you a prophet to the nations."
"Then I said, Ah, Lord God! behold I cannot speak: for I am a child."
"BUT the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for you shall go to all that I shall send you, and whatever I command you to say you shall speak."
"Be not afraid of their faces: for I AM with you to deliver you, saith the Lord."
"Then the Lord put forth his hand, and touched my mouth. And the Lord said unto me, BEHOLD, I have put my words in your mouth."
Jeremiah had a hard job to do as prophet for God. He had to tell the people what God had said and even battle lying prophets who said everything was going to be ok and that judgement was not coming upon the country. Who would want that job? Let's not forget though that even if everyone rejected him that didn't change the fact that He was CHOSEN by God and given a message to speak. I'm sure with a burning fire in his chest and sweaty palms he relayed the message of God. What did he do when his message was completely ignored and rejected? I don't know what did Jesus do?
I want to sit down and talk to him and ask him in the end was the rejection of this world worth it, BUT I know the answer already!!!
"
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Remind me again...
The wind is blowing today. As I look outside and see the trees blowing in the wind and everything that is not anchored in the ground blowing away, I wish I was one of those trees. I wish that the wind could come and sweep away all my worries and just leave me standing tall. Ever have one of those days when you can't seem to shake the heavies. When you feel like the world is revolving on your shoulders? Some days the weight of responsibility seems too much to bear.
In the midst of all these thoughts the story of the woman at the well came to my mind. Shamefully when I think of that story sometimes and the words that Jesus spoke I roll my eyes and think "yeah right, never thirst again". What is it about us humans that we think life should be trouble free? For me troubles are the very thing that make me run to Jesus. When things are good, when the sun is shining without the cold and wind, I forget about Jesus. Not outwardly. No I still do the right things, but it's just become routine. But, when my heart is troubled then I remember my God. Reminds me of the Israelites. Always forgetting God until troubles come.
Never thirst again... Did Jesus mean that we would never have longing in our soul? No. Did Jesus say we would never yearn? No. When I was having all these thoughts God's Spirit rushed in and spoke to my heart. The other words of Jesus... "We will have trouble in this life." We will have anxious thoughts and we will doubt. Sometimes we will be lonely and scared. Sometimes we will face giants that threaten to destroy us. We have an enemy seeking to devour us. No there is no end the trouble we will face in this life...
Never thirst again. The Lord spoke to me of thirst. You can die of thirst, but there are definitely warning signs before you kill over. Your mouth gets dry first. So, what do you do? Do you just sit there? NO. What about eating something salty? NO. Do you stand at the faucet and stared at it until your thirst goes away? Or do you walk away and just hope that this blasted thirst will just go away if you try not to think about it. Then what happens... you start to have "hunger" pains that you don't realize are from thirst. So, you eat something and realize your even more thirsty than before. After a while you get a headache and then you start to feel light headed and fatigued... After a few days you're so weak you don't even want to raise your head. Eventually thirst can lead death.
It's humorous to me right now as I get this mental image of my spiritual life. Never thirst again... Yes we have the living water, yes he meets our needs, no we don't have to go to something over and over again to quench that thirst, but we have to ABIDE. Jesus said "I am the Vine, you are the branches. If a man ABIDE in me, and I in Him, he will bear much fruit." But we have to abide. W have to live in the Spirit and walk in the Spirit. We have to turn the faucet on.
As if to illustrate this point Jordan just walked up to me and said "Do you have a drink somewhere" and I handed her my drink... The End. Thirst Quenched.
Are you thirsty? Do you roll your eyes when you think about never thirsting again? Do you have sin in your life that separates you from the one who can satisfy you? Have you slipped away and run to other things to satisfy that longing? Do you think boy I sure am thirsty I wish that water would just get on me? Have you just given up and walked away from the faucet? Go back and turn it on and stick your head in. Get a big drink. Jesus can satisfy. We don't have to thirst again, but we have to drink in that living water. I promise you that water is still flowing!
Lord, I am thirsty. I feel dry and brittle. I need that life giving flow. I confess that I have slipped away AGAIN. Draw me to that living water again. I hear the sound of a waterfall in the distance lead me there once again I've lost my way. Thank you that you are the living water and that you will satisfy this thirsty soul once again.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
In a bag, in my fridge, and in my heart...
Day 6 of the joy dare... Thanks Sharity and Gayla for the encouragement!!!
In a bag...
After much meditation I FINALLY realized that NOTHING could beat out the gift in a bag that I received from my wonderful brother in love Jason... 3 pairs of fuzzy socks. Soft, comfortable, and extremely cute. Fuzzy socks are not only fun, but fashionable. Just like Jason himself!!!
In my fridge...
This took NO thought... OF COURSE Creamer is the thing in my fridge that brings me the most joy. When you have 2 little ones that get up before the sun breaks on the horizon you NEED something to look forward to. When I hear the words "the light is on outside", I wake up looking forward to a great cup of coffee!!!
In my heart...
Today when all my children ate the oatmeal I had made without complaining I was really happy, but when they each said "thanks mom for making us good food" I was filled with joy. Especially because I know that oatmeal is the last thing they want to see on the breakfast table... It's moments like that that make you stop and think I am doing something right. Thank you, Jesus for helping me along the way to not do the easy thing. Thank you, Lord for showing me in small moments like this that the dedication to train them up in the best possible way (for YOU) is going to pay off someday. Please direct their hearts to worship you and love others as they love themselves!!!!
That's a wrap for day 6... Again I praise God for the small things in life that bring great JOY and for this challenge to really pay attention to the gifts you give!!!
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Day 5 of the Joy dare.
Well, it's been a busy day so I'm just now sitting down to reflect on the small things that bring me joy. Today I'm actually doing the 5th day.
Day 5... Something Old, New, and Blue.
Day 5 was a little harder for me. I had to put some thought in it, but when I did I came up with some things that made me stop and really thank the Lord for.
Something old...
A wine decanter and glasses that were my real mother's. Someone saved a few very special and valuable things for me. My mother died when I was about 2. I don't really know a lot about her even though some have tried to give me insight. I think in my heart that we are very much alike, even if it doesn't look like it on the outside. I know we both love my crazy Father, and that's saying something. (hee hee) for those who know my Papi. When I look at this gift it never fails to draw me closer to the one who gave me life. Even if I don't know her I KNOW her and I feel her and that's why this something old is very special to me. She left a deep impression of her love in my heart and for that I am forever thankful.
Something new...
I had to think about this one hard as well too, but when I figured it out I was SURE this is the one new thing that brings me joy!!! MY NEW COMPUTER!!! My old piece of junk was on it's last toe. I came down to get on it one day it would not even turn on. I hadn't been able to use my "lap-top" on my actual lab for 2 years because it had to be plugged up somewhere. Even with high-speed Internet I thought I was using dial-up. Most of the websites I wanted to go to my computer would not connect to. Needless to say It was time to have a funeral service for my dear old computer. That day after I had resolved myself to not having a computer for a while my computer fairy Jen came in and handed me a box with you guessed it a BRAND NEW COMPUTER. OHMYGOONESS I couldn't believe how wonderful this was a new computer what a blessing!!! Thank you Aunt Jen.
Something blue...
Another hard one and another good one!!! I was sitting in my "blue" bathroom trying to be inspired. Blue is my favorite color this shouldn't be hard and there are some beautiful candle holders and other decorations, but nothing that really brought me any joy... And then I looked up and saw the most precious thing that I have that is blue. A picture drawn by my little princess when she was 5. A picture on blue paper. A picture of the two of us playing in wildflowers. I have it framed in a beautiful frame and put it in a special place because I never want anything to happen to and I knew this is my something blue.
These are my special things something old, new and blue. After a moment of reflecting on each one I give praise to my Heavenly Father for the little things that mean so much!!! Each one a reminder of the blessing in my life and the love he's has bestowed on one so unworthy!!!
Monday, January 9, 2012
Joy Dare Cont.
The Joy Dare day 3 is three things overheard.
Being woken up at 6am by my little guy saying "da, da... hot dog, hot dog, hot dog, dog." How can you be mad when you hear something so sweet...
When I asked my 3 yr old for a piece of his candy and he said "You can't have candy, you're an adult." Isn't it so true that you wait your whole life to grow-up and do what you want to do only to find out that you can't just do what you want to.
The last thing that I have overheard that brought joy to my heart was my 6 and 7 year old reading the 95th psalm. "O come, let us sing unto the LORD: let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation. Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving, and make a joyful noise unto him with psalms. For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods." This one is double joyful for me because they are reading God's word for themselves AND because I taught them how to read. I am so thankful that God allows me to be home and that I am able to teach them and be with them all throughout the day. I never have to miss anything wonderful that they do.
The 4th day of the Joy dare was... Something I'm reading, making, or seeing.
Something that I am reading that brings me joy is "The Smart Puppy" it's a dog training book. We just got two puppies for Christmas and I posted something on FB about getting tired of cleaning up poo. One of the ladies at my church responded with advice about dog training and then in a few days we received a book in the mail from Amazon. I thought that was so sweet of her to take the time out to do that for me. Lord knows all a homeschooling mom of 4 needs is to take on the job of training 2 dogs, but now I am armed with some good sound advice... Thank you Darla!!!
Something I am making I'm ashamed to say is my 3yr old's baby book. This brings me a mixture of joy and pain though. Going back and thinking about my warrior has been so bittersweet. My favorite memory of him was when he was first born and we was wide awake and looking around at everything. I could not believe how alert he was. He didn't fall asleep that night until he had been up 6 hours straight. I KNEW then that we were in trouble and I was right. He has been the hardest child along the way, but his sweet moments are the best...
Something I'm seeing... This is a gift that was given to me by my mother in love... It's a "Blessing box" and she wrote a blessing letter to go inside it. When I look at the box I'm reminded of the wonderful friendship that we have. When I need someone to talk to who I know will listen, but still tell me the truth (in love) she is the one. We refer to each other as Ruth and Naomi. We are sojourners in the life and I'm so thankful for our friendship!!!
Well, that wraps up day 3 and 4. I'm trying to get caught up so that I will be on the right day, but I know you're ready for a break... I sure am. Gotta get to work!!!
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Catching up on Joy...
Since I came by the Joy dare on the 7 day I decided today I would go back and do the first 6.
Day 1 of the Joy Dare: 3 things about myself I'm thankful for.
The first thing that came to my mind to be thankful for was the faith that God has given me to believe his word. The Bible talks about hearts that are receptive to the message of the Gospel and those that are not. Although this is not a result of anything I have done I am so very thankful that when the Spirit called and continues to call upon my heart it softens and turns to the call. I am thankful that God has given me the faith to believe in Him for my salvation, but also for the faith to believe that His word is the only Truth.
The second thing about myself that I am thankful for is the realization that people are the way they are because of the experiences they have had in this life. Even though sometimes I get frustrated with people I try to look past what they are doing to the why of what they are doing. I heard a long time ago that people respond to life out of hurts that they have experienced in the past. Being able to look past actions to the heart of the person gives you the ability to love them when you may not like what they do.
The third thing that about myself that I am thankful for is my willingness to accept each child as a blessing from God. Even if I may not always think this is the right time or that we can't handle any more I know that God is Sovereign and He knows what He is doing. I know that each child He has brought into our life has blessed us and grown us in ways that nothing else could. We are better people because of the small people that God has given us. No matter what He knows better than we do of what we can handle.
Each one of these things are not something that I have done or come by naturally, but they are the things that I love about myself that God has done in my life in the last 15 years since I became a follower of Christ. They are a result of God's transforming power in my life and I am so thankful that God is completing the work that he started in me so long ago. I'm thankful for the power of God's word to transform a life into something beautiful!!!
The 2nd day of the dare was a gift outside, inside, and on a plate.
Something that always brings me joy outside is a tree. Trees are so amazing to me. When I go on a walk with my children I always look around and I can't help, but be overwhelmed by God's wisdom and imagination. To think that the Great Oak comes from a tiny seed. Trees amaze me because there are so many different kinds. Big trees, small trees, thin leaves, fat leaves, or even bristles. Some bear fruit and some nuts. Some flower and some have cones. Trees are one of those things that lead me to praise God for his creation because no matter where you are you can see them and study their differences.
The thing that brings me joy inside my house is my bedroom. It's a sanctuary, a quiet place, a beautiful place. This is the place I can go away and get quiet and feel the presence of God. No matter what craziness I have experienced throughout the day I know that when I enter that place I can pray and reflect and just chill. It's also a beautiful place because it represents the place where husband and wife can be together uninterrupted.
Right now the thing on a plate that brings me joy is black bean and corn salsa. I know that's probably strange, but that's the thing right now it could change at any time. I like it though because it full of good stuff and I don't feel guilty about eating it. YUM!!! I love that God made food for our body, but he also made it to be enjoyed.
Well, that's the 1st 2 days of the Joy dare and I have to take a break to do other stuff so that's where I will end for now!!! I hope the small things that I wrote will inspire you to find things that bring you joy and make you thankful!!!
Day 1 of the Joy Dare: 3 things about myself I'm thankful for.
The first thing that came to my mind to be thankful for was the faith that God has given me to believe his word. The Bible talks about hearts that are receptive to the message of the Gospel and those that are not. Although this is not a result of anything I have done I am so very thankful that when the Spirit called and continues to call upon my heart it softens and turns to the call. I am thankful that God has given me the faith to believe in Him for my salvation, but also for the faith to believe that His word is the only Truth.
The second thing about myself that I am thankful for is the realization that people are the way they are because of the experiences they have had in this life. Even though sometimes I get frustrated with people I try to look past what they are doing to the why of what they are doing. I heard a long time ago that people respond to life out of hurts that they have experienced in the past. Being able to look past actions to the heart of the person gives you the ability to love them when you may not like what they do.
The third thing that about myself that I am thankful for is my willingness to accept each child as a blessing from God. Even if I may not always think this is the right time or that we can't handle any more I know that God is Sovereign and He knows what He is doing. I know that each child He has brought into our life has blessed us and grown us in ways that nothing else could. We are better people because of the small people that God has given us. No matter what He knows better than we do of what we can handle.
Each one of these things are not something that I have done or come by naturally, but they are the things that I love about myself that God has done in my life in the last 15 years since I became a follower of Christ. They are a result of God's transforming power in my life and I am so thankful that God is completing the work that he started in me so long ago. I'm thankful for the power of God's word to transform a life into something beautiful!!!
The 2nd day of the dare was a gift outside, inside, and on a plate.
Something that always brings me joy outside is a tree. Trees are so amazing to me. When I go on a walk with my children I always look around and I can't help, but be overwhelmed by God's wisdom and imagination. To think that the Great Oak comes from a tiny seed. Trees amaze me because there are so many different kinds. Big trees, small trees, thin leaves, fat leaves, or even bristles. Some bear fruit and some nuts. Some flower and some have cones. Trees are one of those things that lead me to praise God for his creation because no matter where you are you can see them and study their differences.
The thing that brings me joy inside my house is my bedroom. It's a sanctuary, a quiet place, a beautiful place. This is the place I can go away and get quiet and feel the presence of God. No matter what craziness I have experienced throughout the day I know that when I enter that place I can pray and reflect and just chill. It's also a beautiful place because it represents the place where husband and wife can be together uninterrupted.
Right now the thing on a plate that brings me joy is black bean and corn salsa. I know that's probably strange, but that's the thing right now it could change at any time. I like it though because it full of good stuff and I don't feel guilty about eating it. YUM!!! I love that God made food for our body, but he also made it to be enjoyed.
Well, that's the 1st 2 days of the Joy dare and I have to take a break to do other stuff so that's where I will end for now!!! I hope the small things that I wrote will inspire you to find things that bring you joy and make you thankful!!!
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Taking the joy dare!!!
I have been longing to be more joyful and I was inspired when I came by this post... Joy is a habit we have to cultivate. A habit must replaced with a new habit. I have the habit of complaining and being less than content so that habit must be replaced with a habit of praise and thanks....
Today being the 7th: 3 graces from people I love.
1. The unconditional love of my daughter who told me last night that I am the best mom ever and she would never want another mom. I know I'm not, but I am so thankful for her love because I have been hard on her and she is the oldest. I didn't really have a clue about being a mother, and most the time still don't, but she loves me anyway. She has taught me how to love more deeply.
2. My husband's sense of humor. He makes me smile when I want to cry and laugh when I would rather be mad. He interjects silliness into any situation. He helps me to see the brighter side of any situation. I'm thankful that He knows how to make me laugh!
3. My Mom's acceptance of hard situations. She has been dealing with lung cancer for the last year and no matter what she had to go through she just did it. She took the punches as they came and did it with so much grace. I respect her so much for fighting this thing and growing so much as a person in the face of the hardships.
These are the 3 people, but there are so many things about so many people that I could choose. I am thankful for all the amazing people that God has so lovingly placed in my life. Once I started looking there was something amazing about every person I know!!! Usually I'm talking about what I don't like... What a change in perspective.
Today being the 7th: 3 graces from people I love.
1. The unconditional love of my daughter who told me last night that I am the best mom ever and she would never want another mom. I know I'm not, but I am so thankful for her love because I have been hard on her and she is the oldest. I didn't really have a clue about being a mother, and most the time still don't, but she loves me anyway. She has taught me how to love more deeply.
2. My husband's sense of humor. He makes me smile when I want to cry and laugh when I would rather be mad. He interjects silliness into any situation. He helps me to see the brighter side of any situation. I'm thankful that He knows how to make me laugh!
3. My Mom's acceptance of hard situations. She has been dealing with lung cancer for the last year and no matter what she had to go through she just did it. She took the punches as they came and did it with so much grace. I respect her so much for fighting this thing and growing so much as a person in the face of the hardships.
These are the 3 people, but there are so many things about so many people that I could choose. I am thankful for all the amazing people that God has so lovingly placed in my life. Once I started looking there was something amazing about every person I know!!! Usually I'm talking about what I don't like... What a change in perspective.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Teach me to love my children...
If there is one thing I have learned since I decided to follow Christ it's this LOVE IS... AN ACTION. Love is often not love if it is not a sacrifice.
Titus 2:4 says that the older woman should "teach the younger woman to love their husbands and to love their children."
I don't know shouldn't loving our children be a no brainer??? Why should someone have to teach us how to love our children??? Why would God inspire the writer of Titus to include this? I think for the same reason He had to inspire the writer of I Cor 13 to explain what LOVE IS...
Love is Patient, Love is Kind
Love does not envy;
Love does not puff itself up,
Love does not behave its rudely,
Love does not seek it's own way, it is
not easily angered.
Using these verses we can gauge our Love.
I'm thinking about this verse today because it was "one of those days". We had a LONG busy weekend. Late nights and early mornings. And my children have been wild and crazy today. They are on overdrive and I am tired and grumpy. I want to lock them all in a padded room and go find a quiet place to take a nap. Since I can't do that my next impulse is to yell and scream and make everyone as miserable as I am. It was in one of those moments that this verse came into my mind. Praise God for his precious spirit for saving them from "me". Without the Word of God I am NOT the same person. I am a selfish, self-indulgent, self-worshipping person. So, I NEED God's word to show me what Love is. I need the Spirit of God to help me love that way.
We get a glimpse of this kind of love in Matthew 14:14 "And Jesus went forth, and saw a great multitude, and was moved with compassion toward them and He healed their sick."
What happens before this verse is really important. At this point Jesus is weary. He has just learned that his cousin John the baptist has been beheaded and he is mourning. He wants to go to a quiet place and get away. He wants to cry and be left alone. He has been healing people and raising the dead, giving sight to the blind. He is exhausted and all he wants to do is REST. BUT, as He is going to get away people begin to follow him. Hordes of people looking for Jesus. Wanting something from Jesus. Right at the time HE DID NOT FEEL LIKE BEING WANTED. What did Jesus do in that moment? He GAVE more. He had compassion on them. He saw their need and he felt their pain and He responded by healing all their sickness and then He fed the 5,000. Verse 18 says "Bring them to me." and He fed them. THAT is WHY God told the older woman to teach the younger woman to love their children. Because Love is a VERB. Love does what we don't want to do. Love puts others first and ourselves (our needs, our wants, our desires) LAST. Jesus is our example. God put these little people in my life to teach me what love is. Since the day I knew I had a life growing inside of me I have had great affection and emotion towards each of my children. Love goes past affection and devotion and emotion to a place of sacrifice for another person. Most mothers if they are worth anything would sacrifice her life in place of her child, but would you sacrifice your time, wants, needs for your child? What about that few minutes after you lay them to bed and all you want to do is chill out. You know what I mean you don't want to see or hear another thing. You don't want to be needed... What if they came looking for you. What if they had a real need. What if they just wanted to talk?! Would you sacrifice then?
Love is a sacrifice and it's inconvenient and that's why we have to be taught how to love.
Titus 2:4 says that the older woman should "teach the younger woman to love their husbands and to love their children."
I don't know shouldn't loving our children be a no brainer??? Why should someone have to teach us how to love our children??? Why would God inspire the writer of Titus to include this? I think for the same reason He had to inspire the writer of I Cor 13 to explain what LOVE IS...
Love is Patient, Love is Kind
Love does not envy;
Love does not puff itself up,
Love does not behave its rudely,
Love does not seek it's own way, it is
not easily angered.
Using these verses we can gauge our Love.
I'm thinking about this verse today because it was "one of those days". We had a LONG busy weekend. Late nights and early mornings. And my children have been wild and crazy today. They are on overdrive and I am tired and grumpy. I want to lock them all in a padded room and go find a quiet place to take a nap. Since I can't do that my next impulse is to yell and scream and make everyone as miserable as I am. It was in one of those moments that this verse came into my mind. Praise God for his precious spirit for saving them from "me". Without the Word of God I am NOT the same person. I am a selfish, self-indulgent, self-worshipping person. So, I NEED God's word to show me what Love is. I need the Spirit of God to help me love that way.
We get a glimpse of this kind of love in Matthew 14:14 "And Jesus went forth, and saw a great multitude, and was moved with compassion toward them and He healed their sick."
What happens before this verse is really important. At this point Jesus is weary. He has just learned that his cousin John the baptist has been beheaded and he is mourning. He wants to go to a quiet place and get away. He wants to cry and be left alone. He has been healing people and raising the dead, giving sight to the blind. He is exhausted and all he wants to do is REST. BUT, as He is going to get away people begin to follow him. Hordes of people looking for Jesus. Wanting something from Jesus. Right at the time HE DID NOT FEEL LIKE BEING WANTED. What did Jesus do in that moment? He GAVE more. He had compassion on them. He saw their need and he felt their pain and He responded by healing all their sickness and then He fed the 5,000. Verse 18 says "Bring them to me." and He fed them. THAT is WHY God told the older woman to teach the younger woman to love their children. Because Love is a VERB. Love does what we don't want to do. Love puts others first and ourselves (our needs, our wants, our desires) LAST. Jesus is our example. God put these little people in my life to teach me what love is. Since the day I knew I had a life growing inside of me I have had great affection and emotion towards each of my children. Love goes past affection and devotion and emotion to a place of sacrifice for another person. Most mothers if they are worth anything would sacrifice her life in place of her child, but would you sacrifice your time, wants, needs for your child? What about that few minutes after you lay them to bed and all you want to do is chill out. You know what I mean you don't want to see or hear another thing. You don't want to be needed... What if they came looking for you. What if they had a real need. What if they just wanted to talk?! Would you sacrifice then?
Love is a sacrifice and it's inconvenient and that's why we have to be taught how to love.
Monday, April 11, 2011
T. G. I. Monday!!!
I know I know what am I thinking??? It's hard to believe, but I LOVE Mondays. They refresh my soul. I have never been an organized person or someone who keeps to a schedule, but recently I have been doing some soul searching. God has brought to my attention through a series of books, articles and of course the bible that IF I am to be a Keeper of the Home I NEED to spend more time at home. I have in the recent past been going and doing more than I should. I think as home-school mommies we can get sucked into thinking that we have to have our kids involved in "stuff" or they won't be normal. We "must" make them social creatures... blah, blah, blah. You know what I mean. The problem being that I couldn't ever get ANYTHING done. I have 4 children and my oldest is the only girl so in the best interest of her I have been trying so hard to get her involved with other girls since she doesn't have a sister... The Lord recently brought to my attention that this is "Worry" the opposite of contentment. WHICH I am rubbing of on her. Would our children be content and thankful IF we were not constantly trying to fill in what we perceive to be the empty spaces of our lives?! So, I have begun to pray for the Lord to help me LOVE being AT HOME... And to put first things first. Help me learn to be the keeper of my home and all that goes along with that. I am first and foremost (striving to be a Godly woman), a wife, then mother, then school-teacher, house manager, bill-payer, etc. Surely God would not have given me this cup IF with the help of the Holy Spirit I could not handle it. "I can do ALL (these) things, through Christ who gives me strength." Well, immediately God began to show me how I needed to rearrange my (non-existent) schedule and put my priorities in order of greatest to least. "Seek ye first the Kingdom, then all (these) things will be added unto you." First thing is To-do list and stick to it... Who woulda thunk that this is all it would take?! All the sudden I have time to fit it all in and my kids are schooled, my dishes clean, laundry (some-what) done, and then at the end of the day my daughter gets to go outside and play with her two girlfriends that live RIGHT NEXT DOOR!!! However, all of this does not explain WHY I LOVE MONDAYS... Since I have been praying for all of those things my heart has begun to LOVE being at home and keeping my home. THEN the weekend happens and there is no schedule and we're running here and there. And Sunday is a day of church and rest so by Sunday night my house looks like a tornado came through and the dishes and laundry are pile up again. Sunday does give me a chance to refresh my soul, but when Monday rolls around I'm glad to get back to Keeping my Home... I'm thankful for this my domain and I pray that God will continually draw my heart back to it. There are so many things that can draw us away. There are so many that would tell us there is MORE OUT THERE. There are so many that would try to convince us that we are UN-FULFILLED... We have to be on constant watch against the schemes of the enemy and keep our priorities in order. We must guard our hearts against being draw away by our own lusts. God has a purpose and a specific plan for us as wives and mothers. I pray I will conform not to the ideas and values of this world no matter how hard it is or how tempting or how others view me. I have to see my life from a heavenly perspective.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Do you ever...
Have those days when you forget to remember how blessed you are? There are a lot of places in the scriptures where God tells someone to write down the things that He has done so they could go back and see how He had worked in their behalf. WHY? Because He knows how forgetful we are. He has been showing me this lately usually through my daughter.
Everyday I try to let my children have some kind of treat or special thing. Sometimes even two treats... For some reason my daughter is the one who is always coming to ask me for something else. Maybe because she of all my children is the most like me. I have to remind her of the other things she has had that day and explain that's why she can't have what she wants at that point. I try to explain why too many treats is not a good idea, but alas she is a child and she really doesn't get it. Do you ever do that with the Lord. Do you ever have a prayer request that is the MOST important thing in your world and then He answers and you forget? The gratitude over that answered prayer so short lived that you come back moments later with what is the next "NEED" in your life. I'm sure if you're a mom you know how much you want to make your kids happy, but sometimes you just wish they didn't want so much or would just be content for a little bit?! Sometimes I have to tell her "Don't ask me for anything else today"... It's when I have said those words that I am reminded of how much I ask my heavenly Father. I'm not talking about serious stuff like friends/family salvation or sickness... I'm talking about my wants that really mean nothing.
When I stop and think about all that I have been given I'm shamed about how much I focus on me. I'm embarrassed that I spend so much time praying and whining about what I don't have when there are so many who really need an answered prayer. I'm glad that the Lord has been revealing this to me in this way because it really hit home. I'm spoiled and loved and overwhelmed with the goodness of the Lord. Every Good gift comes down from the Father... May I begin to remember all His good gifts instead of wasting time thinking of what I want next.
Everyday I try to let my children have some kind of treat or special thing. Sometimes even two treats... For some reason my daughter is the one who is always coming to ask me for something else. Maybe because she of all my children is the most like me. I have to remind her of the other things she has had that day and explain that's why she can't have what she wants at that point. I try to explain why too many treats is not a good idea, but alas she is a child and she really doesn't get it. Do you ever do that with the Lord. Do you ever have a prayer request that is the MOST important thing in your world and then He answers and you forget? The gratitude over that answered prayer so short lived that you come back moments later with what is the next "NEED" in your life. I'm sure if you're a mom you know how much you want to make your kids happy, but sometimes you just wish they didn't want so much or would just be content for a little bit?! Sometimes I have to tell her "Don't ask me for anything else today"... It's when I have said those words that I am reminded of how much I ask my heavenly Father. I'm not talking about serious stuff like friends/family salvation or sickness... I'm talking about my wants that really mean nothing.
When I stop and think about all that I have been given I'm shamed about how much I focus on me. I'm embarrassed that I spend so much time praying and whining about what I don't have when there are so many who really need an answered prayer. I'm glad that the Lord has been revealing this to me in this way because it really hit home. I'm spoiled and loved and overwhelmed with the goodness of the Lord. Every Good gift comes down from the Father... May I begin to remember all His good gifts instead of wasting time thinking of what I want next.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Finding Time and believing lies...
Today I was a ranting raving crazy Momma. By the middle of the day I thought I really better get out of here before I messed things up good. Of course I thought it was the kids, or the house, or homeschooling. I was feeling pretty overwhelmed and thinking maybe I was the wrong person for the job. All I could see was a messy house, a crying baby, a screaming toddler and two big kids running around doing nothing productive!!!
The thing is that is the exact opposite of what I want for my life. I truly desire to be all that God wants me to be and I want to do it with a cheerful disposition. I want to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I'm striving to learn and grow and become. I feel like the caterpillar inside the cocoon. Wrestling, twisting, and turning. Wanting to go forward to the new, but feeling so comfortable with the old. When will I become that butterfly???
So, today as I'm "thinking" only negative thoughts about myself and my life I received an email that talked about the enemies mission against a child of God. IF you belong to God then satan has no power over your soul or your eternity, but He does have the power to come against you in other ways. His greatest weapon is discouragement. He whispers those little lies that say you will never make it. You will never become what God wants you to be. You're doing a terrible job so why don't you give up. For me personally the enemy tells me that if I didn't have all these kids or if I didn't home school I would be able to do more. I would have more time if I didn't have so much going on... He tells me I just don't have enough time to do it all... All these negative thoughts all day feeding on my resolve and courage to push on.
After reading the email about thoughts and the enemies attack I "thought" or better yet God whispered to my heart that has been the problem today... I have been believing the lies all day. So, now I need to change my thinking... I need to start thinking on things that are pure and true and right... if there be any virtue or praise think on these things. I need to start listening to the Voice of Truth... because HE says "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." I have to stop believing the lies...
That's not all though God began to show me that I have time for what I want to do. I have time to spend on facebook or email. My time is precious and there isn't a lot of it so I need to really prioritize it. I also need to be more organized and proactive with my time even if that means writing a schedule out and sticking to it throughout the day. BUT, I cannot believe the lie that I don't have enough time in the day. I have to start a task and finish it so that I'm not looking around at a bunch of half done things all day. I know that I will feel more productive and encouraged when I have folded AND put up the laundry or when I have washed/dried AND put up the dishes... BUT, it's TIME to stop feeding on lies. This is my life and I love it. I know that things in the future will be harder even still than where I am now so I must take this time to learn and grow for the future!!!
Lord please help me to see every opportunity to become what you want me to be. Help me to call upon your NAME when I am feeling troubled. Help me listen to you and not my enemy... Thank you Lord for all the work you have done in my life!!! I love you!!!
The thing is that is the exact opposite of what I want for my life. I truly desire to be all that God wants me to be and I want to do it with a cheerful disposition. I want to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I'm striving to learn and grow and become. I feel like the caterpillar inside the cocoon. Wrestling, twisting, and turning. Wanting to go forward to the new, but feeling so comfortable with the old. When will I become that butterfly???
So, today as I'm "thinking" only negative thoughts about myself and my life I received an email that talked about the enemies mission against a child of God. IF you belong to God then satan has no power over your soul or your eternity, but He does have the power to come against you in other ways. His greatest weapon is discouragement. He whispers those little lies that say you will never make it. You will never become what God wants you to be. You're doing a terrible job so why don't you give up. For me personally the enemy tells me that if I didn't have all these kids or if I didn't home school I would be able to do more. I would have more time if I didn't have so much going on... He tells me I just don't have enough time to do it all... All these negative thoughts all day feeding on my resolve and courage to push on.
After reading the email about thoughts and the enemies attack I "thought" or better yet God whispered to my heart that has been the problem today... I have been believing the lies all day. So, now I need to change my thinking... I need to start thinking on things that are pure and true and right... if there be any virtue or praise think on these things. I need to start listening to the Voice of Truth... because HE says "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." I have to stop believing the lies...
That's not all though God began to show me that I have time for what I want to do. I have time to spend on facebook or email. My time is precious and there isn't a lot of it so I need to really prioritize it. I also need to be more organized and proactive with my time even if that means writing a schedule out and sticking to it throughout the day. BUT, I cannot believe the lie that I don't have enough time in the day. I have to start a task and finish it so that I'm not looking around at a bunch of half done things all day. I know that I will feel more productive and encouraged when I have folded AND put up the laundry or when I have washed/dried AND put up the dishes... BUT, it's TIME to stop feeding on lies. This is my life and I love it. I know that things in the future will be harder even still than where I am now so I must take this time to learn and grow for the future!!!
Lord please help me to see every opportunity to become what you want me to be. Help me to call upon your NAME when I am feeling troubled. Help me listen to you and not my enemy... Thank you Lord for all the work you have done in my life!!! I love you!!!
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Love is...
Remember the comic strip "Love Is..." Love was always some action that you could do. I'm sure that they got this from God's Word. I Corinthinians 14... The famous love chapter as I've heard it called.
Love suffers long, and love is kind;
love does not envy,
love does not brag on itself,
love is not arrogant.
Love does not behave itself rudely,
love does not seek it's own way,
love is not easily angered,
and love thinks no evil.
Love does not rejoice in iniquity,
but it rejoices in TRUTH.
Love bears ALL things, endures ALL things,
hopes ALL things.
LOVE NEVER FAILS.
"Greater Love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13
Real Love is Jesus laying down his life for us. Real love is while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. Real love goes FAR above and beyond what is required. Real love hurts. Real love requires sacrifice and surrender. Love is an action. Love is a decision. Real love is not something you and I are capable on our own. Real love is something that takes lots of practice so we are given lots of opportunities to express Real love.
As a mom and wife I am learning that there is always a choice. Will I love my family this time? What about this time or the next time??? Love is patient, love is kind... Have I been that today? If not then I have not loved. Have I been easily angered? Do I keep records for the wrong done unto me (even by my children)? Then I have not loved!!! I promise they know the difference between when I have loved and when I have not... If we say we have loved God, but do not love others then we have lied... (james)
Love covers a multitude of sins (done to us). The only way we can love like this is with the Spirit of God because... "God is LOVE", but even then love is not something that comes natural to us. We have to cultivate a spirit of love. We have to water it and weed it and grow love strong in our lives. We have to take every opportunity to share love with those around us especially our family. This is our ministry from God as wives. Love is our calling as the of children of God.
All you need is LOVE. Please help me to LOVE like you do Lord, because I'm no good at this. Help me to love beyond what I feel at any given moment!!!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Like HIM...
Do you ever think about how the here and now is preparing you for the future? Or are you like me and just muddle through complaining about the inconveniences of life?
Do you ever realize when God is giving you a perfect opportunity to practice what you preach in front of your children??
Recently I had a chance to "show" my daughter what I've been telling her for a long time. I try to teach her about how we should treat people. How we should love them unconditionally and how we should care about them in real ways like Jesus would. We are the hands and the feet of Christ. The problem is that I am not very good at this myself especially if it inconviences me or makes me uncomfortable. BUT, God is showing me you can never teach anything you do not do yourself.
I confess that I need to practice compassion and understanding alot more than I do. I confess that I need to practice patience and kindness alot more than I do. I read a post from someone the other day that reminded me that we have been given all the gifts of the Holy Spirit when we received Christ so now we just have to use them. I confess that I need to die to myself because I don't want to be bothered by other peoples issues. I know that sounds terrible and I almost don't want to admit that for fear that of what some might think, but it's true I really don't want to be bothered. It is in realizing this that I find great comfort in the FACT that my Savior is nothing like me. He makes it plain that He wants us to bring ALL of our cares to Him. It is in seeing this that I realize how wonderful my Savior is and that He is asking me to be like him and love people the way He does.
Anyway, the other day someone needed some love from me, but I was busy and I didn't want to be bothered. As I was standing at the kitchen sink washing dishes knowing that this person was upset and needed comfort the Lord spoke to my heart "This is a chance to be like me. This is the time to show your daughter how I love people." My heart was convicted, but I still didn't move to do anything. Then you know how God is when He wants to get a point across... Here comes my daughter and she said "Mom, I need to tell you something. " Then she whispered in my ear that this person was upset and crying... Then she just stood there looking at me waiting to see what I was gonna do. Now before you think I'm totally heartless this was at 5:15pm and we had people coming for dinner at 5:30. With 3 kids and a new baby you can imagine what my house looked like. I had just got the call at 4:45 that we were having company over. So, I had to make a decision would I worry about the temporal things or the eternal things? Here is my beautiful kind hearted daughter waiting to see me put my words into practice. When Jesus said we should be like children He was so right. Their hearts are so much softer than ours. Well, as you can plainly see God got his point across. So, I went and hopefully was a comfort to someone in need.
It wasn't until later that God began to show me that He is using every opportunity to prepare me for the future. Recently my husband was ordained into the ministry. He has been a Youth Pastor for many years and we know that God has used all of those years to prepare us for something in the future. This is not a brag by any means, but there have been many people that tell him one day they know God is going to make Him a pastor. He has a heart for people and He can share the word in such a wonderful way. I truly believe He is anointed and that God will use Him mightily. BUT, what would that make me one day??? Unless the Lord takes me home and gives him a more worthy replacement?! That is a joke!!! So, now is my time to prepare and learn and take every chance to be like Jesus. We should no matter our vocation do what we are called to do and that is Love one another!!! In real ways that go beyond ourselves. May God continue to grow me and make me more like His Son Jesus.
Do you ever realize when God is giving you a perfect opportunity to practice what you preach in front of your children??
Recently I had a chance to "show" my daughter what I've been telling her for a long time. I try to teach her about how we should treat people. How we should love them unconditionally and how we should care about them in real ways like Jesus would. We are the hands and the feet of Christ. The problem is that I am not very good at this myself especially if it inconviences me or makes me uncomfortable. BUT, God is showing me you can never teach anything you do not do yourself.
I confess that I need to practice compassion and understanding alot more than I do. I confess that I need to practice patience and kindness alot more than I do. I read a post from someone the other day that reminded me that we have been given all the gifts of the Holy Spirit when we received Christ so now we just have to use them. I confess that I need to die to myself because I don't want to be bothered by other peoples issues. I know that sounds terrible and I almost don't want to admit that for fear that of what some might think, but it's true I really don't want to be bothered. It is in realizing this that I find great comfort in the FACT that my Savior is nothing like me. He makes it plain that He wants us to bring ALL of our cares to Him. It is in seeing this that I realize how wonderful my Savior is and that He is asking me to be like him and love people the way He does.
Anyway, the other day someone needed some love from me, but I was busy and I didn't want to be bothered. As I was standing at the kitchen sink washing dishes knowing that this person was upset and needed comfort the Lord spoke to my heart "This is a chance to be like me. This is the time to show your daughter how I love people." My heart was convicted, but I still didn't move to do anything. Then you know how God is when He wants to get a point across... Here comes my daughter and she said "Mom, I need to tell you something. " Then she whispered in my ear that this person was upset and crying... Then she just stood there looking at me waiting to see what I was gonna do. Now before you think I'm totally heartless this was at 5:15pm and we had people coming for dinner at 5:30. With 3 kids and a new baby you can imagine what my house looked like. I had just got the call at 4:45 that we were having company over. So, I had to make a decision would I worry about the temporal things or the eternal things? Here is my beautiful kind hearted daughter waiting to see me put my words into practice. When Jesus said we should be like children He was so right. Their hearts are so much softer than ours. Well, as you can plainly see God got his point across. So, I went and hopefully was a comfort to someone in need.
It wasn't until later that God began to show me that He is using every opportunity to prepare me for the future. Recently my husband was ordained into the ministry. He has been a Youth Pastor for many years and we know that God has used all of those years to prepare us for something in the future. This is not a brag by any means, but there have been many people that tell him one day they know God is going to make Him a pastor. He has a heart for people and He can share the word in such a wonderful way. I truly believe He is anointed and that God will use Him mightily. BUT, what would that make me one day??? Unless the Lord takes me home and gives him a more worthy replacement?! That is a joke!!! So, now is my time to prepare and learn and take every chance to be like Jesus. We should no matter our vocation do what we are called to do and that is Love one another!!! In real ways that go beyond ourselves. May God continue to grow me and make me more like His Son Jesus.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
The difference...
Some days around here are better than others. Not just for me, but for the kids as well. I am 32 weeks pregnant. My feet hurt and my back aches. My nerves are raw and I have little patience. Sounds like the set-up for disaster... I've been getting up in the morning and having quiet time with the Lord. He is making me ever more aware that He is the Vine and I am the branch... "IF I abide in HIM I will bear much fruit." BUT, if not I will kill the fruit.
There are those days though that I think I'm way too tired and deserve to lay in the bed for an extra hour or two. Thinking foolishly that if I get more rest that I will be able to face the day in better form. Forgetting of COURSE that if I was walking in the SPIRIT that I would be able to face anything today. AND, that the fruit of His Spirit is just what my family actually needs from me... Love, Joy, Peace, Gentleness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Patience and Self-Control... These are the things that make the difference to ME AND THEM. Not more rest. More time with my Father.
On this day when I decided that sleep was so much more important I have managed to treat my children like a nuisance instead of a blessing. What a miracle I have growing inside of me. What precious treasures I have in front of me... Lord, help me to not forget that you MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN ME... AND, they the little people You have given me are the most important "thing" I have. Don't let me go my own way or lean on my own understanding. You can be my rest. You can be my strength, You can be my joy. They need me to be filled with you...
There are those days though that I think I'm way too tired and deserve to lay in the bed for an extra hour or two. Thinking foolishly that if I get more rest that I will be able to face the day in better form. Forgetting of COURSE that if I was walking in the SPIRIT that I would be able to face anything today. AND, that the fruit of His Spirit is just what my family actually needs from me... Love, Joy, Peace, Gentleness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Patience and Self-Control... These are the things that make the difference to ME AND THEM. Not more rest. More time with my Father.
On this day when I decided that sleep was so much more important I have managed to treat my children like a nuisance instead of a blessing. What a miracle I have growing inside of me. What precious treasures I have in front of me... Lord, help me to not forget that you MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN ME... AND, they the little people You have given me are the most important "thing" I have. Don't let me go my own way or lean on my own understanding. You can be my rest. You can be my strength, You can be my joy. They need me to be filled with you...
Friday, February 26, 2010
Light Affictions
Sometimes the Ways and Whys of God are a complete mystery we just have to trust in the perfect Will of God and we have to trust in His Goodness. Sometimes we have to hear what Paul heard "MY Grace is sufficient for You: for MY strength is made perfect in your weakness." 2 Cor 12:9. Sometimes we might think life is too hard or too painful, or too something... Our adversary doesn't have to throw too much at us for us to start believing that God is not there, does not care, is not good. Look at the children of Israel, after all they had seen and "such a great salvation" from Egypt, miracles OUR eyes have never seen. It only took them THREE days of being thirsty to believe God had left them. EVEN though the cloud by day was still there and the fire by night was still there. It doesn't take much...
But, sometimes God shows us a little something of what He is up to. A little morsel to keep us from going off the deep end. I thank God that I have had one of those times lately. I can't say that I have always been faithful to pray and read. I love God's word, but I have been very hit or miss with my quite time and my prayer life has been non-existent. Lately however something has changed for me. I have recognized my complete and utter dependence upon the Lord. So, I have been up in the morning praying and reading and taking God at His word that whatsoever I ask in Jesus name He will give to me. I believe that means if we ask anything that is IN the WILL of GOD. And, my requests have been for the betterment of my Family so I KNOW He will answer those... Somehow though things started to get worse instead of better. I began to get discouraged. Another tactic of the enemy...
This time though instead of giving up I went to the Lord with my honest heart. I told him how I felt (in reverence). I cried and told him what I saw with my eyes and that I was disheartened. I told Him I would continue to seek Him even in this time and that I would choose to praise Him, because I know He is Good and He deserves my praise. Before I was done praying this prayer something AMAZING happened. My Husband walked in the room and got down on His knee and began to pray with me. He began to pray for our family as the Spiritual leader and authority of our Home. Earlier when I had been reading my bible the Lord had shown me something that began to make since right at that moment.
2 Cor 4:14-18 "Knowing that He which raised up the Lord Jesus shall raise up us also by Jesus, and shall present us with you. For ALL THINGS ARE FOR YOUR SAKES, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many abound to the Glory of God. For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, works for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal."
What the Lord was showing me was that all the time God is working in me, but sometimes the afflictions I go through are not just for me, but for others sakes. Sometimes God is working in the lives of those around us and He uses us to get their attention. One of the things that my husband said in is prayer is "I don't know if this is about me, but if it is I GET IT." Exactly what that verse I had read this morning had said to me.
Thank you Heavenly Father for a beautiful Husband with a soft heart. Thank you so much for loving me with an eternal LOVE that is CRAZY. I remember where I was and who I was before You brought me out of the deep pit. It is amazing to me that YOU the creator care so much about me that you would give me your time and meet me every time I come to meet with you... You are WAY beyond my understanding. The more time I spend trying to figure you out the more lost in You I get. I say with David "What is man that you are mindful of Him?"
But, sometimes God shows us a little something of what He is up to. A little morsel to keep us from going off the deep end. I thank God that I have had one of those times lately. I can't say that I have always been faithful to pray and read. I love God's word, but I have been very hit or miss with my quite time and my prayer life has been non-existent. Lately however something has changed for me. I have recognized my complete and utter dependence upon the Lord. So, I have been up in the morning praying and reading and taking God at His word that whatsoever I ask in Jesus name He will give to me. I believe that means if we ask anything that is IN the WILL of GOD. And, my requests have been for the betterment of my Family so I KNOW He will answer those... Somehow though things started to get worse instead of better. I began to get discouraged. Another tactic of the enemy...
This time though instead of giving up I went to the Lord with my honest heart. I told him how I felt (in reverence). I cried and told him what I saw with my eyes and that I was disheartened. I told Him I would continue to seek Him even in this time and that I would choose to praise Him, because I know He is Good and He deserves my praise. Before I was done praying this prayer something AMAZING happened. My Husband walked in the room and got down on His knee and began to pray with me. He began to pray for our family as the Spiritual leader and authority of our Home. Earlier when I had been reading my bible the Lord had shown me something that began to make since right at that moment.
2 Cor 4:14-18 "Knowing that He which raised up the Lord Jesus shall raise up us also by Jesus, and shall present us with you. For ALL THINGS ARE FOR YOUR SAKES, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many abound to the Glory of God. For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, works for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal."
What the Lord was showing me was that all the time God is working in me, but sometimes the afflictions I go through are not just for me, but for others sakes. Sometimes God is working in the lives of those around us and He uses us to get their attention. One of the things that my husband said in is prayer is "I don't know if this is about me, but if it is I GET IT." Exactly what that verse I had read this morning had said to me.
Thank you Heavenly Father for a beautiful Husband with a soft heart. Thank you so much for loving me with an eternal LOVE that is CRAZY. I remember where I was and who I was before You brought me out of the deep pit. It is amazing to me that YOU the creator care so much about me that you would give me your time and meet me every time I come to meet with you... You are WAY beyond my understanding. The more time I spend trying to figure you out the more lost in You I get. I say with David "What is man that you are mindful of Him?"
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Building strong muscles...
I was reading this morning in Proverbs 24:10 "If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small." I have also been praying Proverbs 31 every morning asking God to make me a Virtuous Woman... One of the verses says "She girds her loins with strength, and strengthens her arms. Another says "Strength and honor are her clothing..." Like I said I've been praying these verses every morning lately... But, instead of feeling stronger I have been feeling weaker... Funny how the Lord works.
I'm not going to get into the situations and circumstances that have contributed to this because I would only be trying to win your sympathy and some of you are not at the same stage in life so you might not even understand... BUT, I believe you do understand no matter where you are being tired, discouraged, weak, and maybe feelings of not having enough of you to go around...
Anyways, today I was mulling over that verse in my head as I feel like I'm about to drop dead from emotional and physical exhaustion. "If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small." Over and again I repeat that to myself... Man my strength must be pretty darn small if I'm fainting at this. Then I started to pray to the Lord. I love the verse that says the Spirit makes intercession for us because we don't even know what to pray for. There have been times in my life where I pray something thinking that it was my own thought only to a few minutes later realize that God put that prayer there because He was about to show me something... I love those times because I KNOW that He cares for my little stuff and I KNOW that He understands and I KNOW that He will be my strength when I am just too weak... I love Him so...
So, I'm praying Lord, you know I've been praying for strength and I know that I have to go through all this stuff so that you can make me stronger, but Lord I feel weaker. AND then He said the craziest thing to my heart. He said "Beloved, you only feel weaker, but YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU USED TO BE." Then He gave me a mental picture of how physical exercise feels like it's making us more tired, but it's not it is actually giving us more energy. Physical exercise makes our muscles hurt at first, but only because they are getting stronger. We would never endure anything if we never exorcised and so it is with God. I have been praying to be stronger and feeling weaker, but this is all necessary for me to have the strength to endure what ever comes my way next. This time of weakness is making me stronger for next time. When I am weak, He is strong. The Joy of the Lord is my Strength.
Thank you Lord for being faithful to answer our prayers even when we don't see that you are. My thoughts are not your thoughts. Your WAYS so much higher than mine. Your WAY of doing things is PERFECT, and my understanding is so limited, but YOU are so kind that sometimes you will even explain to your child, your servant, your creation what you are doing... Thank you that when I am in the refining fire you are sitting there intently watching me so I am not destroyed by the heat. Thank you Lord that you will not allow me to stay the way I am. YOU are AMAZING... I am undone in your presence...
I'm not going to get into the situations and circumstances that have contributed to this because I would only be trying to win your sympathy and some of you are not at the same stage in life so you might not even understand... BUT, I believe you do understand no matter where you are being tired, discouraged, weak, and maybe feelings of not having enough of you to go around...
Anyways, today I was mulling over that verse in my head as I feel like I'm about to drop dead from emotional and physical exhaustion. "If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small." Over and again I repeat that to myself... Man my strength must be pretty darn small if I'm fainting at this. Then I started to pray to the Lord. I love the verse that says the Spirit makes intercession for us because we don't even know what to pray for. There have been times in my life where I pray something thinking that it was my own thought only to a few minutes later realize that God put that prayer there because He was about to show me something... I love those times because I KNOW that He cares for my little stuff and I KNOW that He understands and I KNOW that He will be my strength when I am just too weak... I love Him so...
So, I'm praying Lord, you know I've been praying for strength and I know that I have to go through all this stuff so that you can make me stronger, but Lord I feel weaker. AND then He said the craziest thing to my heart. He said "Beloved, you only feel weaker, but YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU USED TO BE." Then He gave me a mental picture of how physical exercise feels like it's making us more tired, but it's not it is actually giving us more energy. Physical exercise makes our muscles hurt at first, but only because they are getting stronger. We would never endure anything if we never exorcised and so it is with God. I have been praying to be stronger and feeling weaker, but this is all necessary for me to have the strength to endure what ever comes my way next. This time of weakness is making me stronger for next time. When I am weak, He is strong. The Joy of the Lord is my Strength.
Thank you Lord for being faithful to answer our prayers even when we don't see that you are. My thoughts are not your thoughts. Your WAYS so much higher than mine. Your WAY of doing things is PERFECT, and my understanding is so limited, but YOU are so kind that sometimes you will even explain to your child, your servant, your creation what you are doing... Thank you that when I am in the refining fire you are sitting there intently watching me so I am not destroyed by the heat. Thank you Lord that you will not allow me to stay the way I am. YOU are AMAZING... I am undone in your presence...
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