Why is it so easy???

To point fingers, place blame, forget our vows, and break the covenant we made with our spouse and God?

I have a friend who is going through a separation. Although I believe with all of my heart that God is going to intervene in this situation it makes me reflect on the tendency to throw away our marriages like so much trash. Where has our loyalty gone, where has our concern gone for our children? Why is it so easy to walk away?

Marriage is a Covenant (an oath, solemn contract made between God and man) whose terms are dictated by God.

Matthew 19:5-6 Jesus says "For this cause shall a man leave Father and Mother, and cleave (be joined) to His wife; and They two shall be one flesh. Therefore they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder."

That verse should serve as a WARNING to people. Remember we made an oath to the Almighty "FOR BETTER OR WORSE". The terms specified and dictated by God. What this world says is okay behavior doesn't apply to His children. Why do we think God overlooks our sin and gives a get out of marriage free pass. We are fooling ourselves. And like so many other sins the consequences of divorce are devastating and undeniable.

Let me say this LOUD and CLEAR. I don't care how amicable your divorce is. I don't care what reason you give. Remember it takes two and because Jesus has forgiven me for EVERYTHING I too can forgive ANYTHING. I don't care how well-adjusted your children seem... There are ALWAYS consequences to Divorce. One study says that children who have had a parent die are much more emotionally healthy than the children of divorce. Believe me I know I am a adult child of Divorce.

Even if you don't believe in Divorce and you just have an attitude of unforgiveness and bitterness you are in sin. Jesus said if you go to give your gift at the alter and remember your brother has aught against you leave your gift and go make it right with your brother. We are so self-righteous. We need to go back and take a good look at the words of our Savior. He said they will know you're my disciples if you LOVE one another. No greater Love hath any man than that He lays down His life for His friends. We say we are Christ Followers, but we can't love and forgive our spouses. How dare we preach to the rest of the world... I know this sounds pretty harsh, but you can be sure that God showed me myself FIRST. My heart is deceitfully wicked above all else and I have a tendency to justify my sin and cling to the wrongs done to me. We have to get rid of our self-righteousness and learn how to LOVE. Because Christianity is not about Good works it's about LOVE.

Must Haves

It's been a wonderful week here in Texas. This is one of my favorite things about living here. You never know what the weather will be like. It has been sunny and 80 for the last 3 days. So, needless to say "we" have been outside as much as possible. Watching the kids play got me to thinking...

With all the gizmo's and gadgets out there you would think that kids aren't happy without a bunch of "stuff", BUT as I have seen this week there really aren't that many things you can't live without except:

1. Dirt or Sand
2. Water
3. Sunshine
4. Bubbles
5. Imagination
6. Plastic bowls and spoons for making mud pies...

These things are the things that can really bring joy to our kids. They have hours of fun with the most basic things. I love my kids they really put life into perspective. I know people who never go outside, never let their kids get dirty, and spend hundreds on games, movies, and toys. I think it's time to unplug and get dirty. Get some vitamin D. It's beginning to look alot like SPRING. Yeah!!!

Tribute to my Husband...

Valentines Day is fast approaching and I am anticipating the same questions I get every year. "What did you get or where did you go or what did you do for V-day."

Well, I really don't like V-day. I don't want my Honey to spend his time fretting over the ways He could show his love to me.

So, as I was thinking about all this an idea came to me. I want my Honey to know that one day a year means nothing, flowers are nice, but they die. Jewelry is beautiful, but really who can afford that right now. Chocolate goes straight to my hips. I want my Honey to know that there are a million ways He shows His love to me everyday...

1. He makes me laugh when I want to cry.
2. He still thinks I'm beautiful, even though I don't look like I did before the kids.
3. He talks to me about things that are weighing on His mind.
4. He loves our children.
5. He works hard EVERYDAY to provide for us.
6. He gives up things that He wants (money, boat, new clothes, etc...) for all of us.
7. He still kisses me like He did at the alter.
8. He cuts me a break when everything isn't done.
9. He orders Pizza sometimes just because.
10. He lets me sleep late or take a nap when I really need it.

These are just a few of the wonderful ways my Knight in Regular Clothes shows me everyday that He loves me. I couldn't imagine my life without His everyday kind of love.

It's me?!

When I was younger and people would ask "the question, 'what do you want to be when you grow up?" My answer was always the same. I wanted to be a wife and mother. I wanted to make a home. It was something that I didn't have when I was young. My Mom was a working mom and she was always tired. It seemed to me that my brother and I were more of an accessory than a legacy. We moved alot due to not having any money. I never had the same friends or went to same schools for long. The only traditions we had were at Christmas and Thanksgiving. I know it sounds like I'm whining, but I'm not I'm just trying to give some background. I don't regret any of that, because it has made me the Wife and Mom I am today.

Anyway, as I grew older and making half-hearted efforts to pursue a degree and "career", people would ask what do you want to do? My answer was the same. I would tell them I'm just wasting time until I get married and start my family. I knew this is what I was supposed to do. Even though I didn't become a Christian until I was 19 I knew I was meant to be a mother with a house full of children. As the years went by people continued to ask because there was not even a marriage prospect around. I was 25, living at home with my parents, working for minimum wage waiting for prince charming. Even I could see how I looked to others. As if I had no drive or ambition, but I knew God would give me the desires of my heart. I had decided not to waste the money to go to school when there was nothing I really wanted to do. I know some would say how lazy or worthless, but I know better, I was staying true to my dreams. I remember even ladies in my church who said things like being a wife and mom were not enough, you needed something more to make you fulfilled. I was dismayed at such comments, but I just trusted the Lord. I prayed for my husband all the time and then one day it happened. I knew He was the one. I'm one of those silly romantics who really believe there's just one and that I have his rib. This year we will be celebrating Six years of marriage and so far we have 3 children under 5. I'm glad I didn't listen to all those people because I would've wasted alot of time and money since I'm making a home here for my family every day...

Although I knew that I was meant to have a large family my DH is another story. I believe that God is the opener and closer of the womb and I have always wanted to leave everything up to him. I want to receive every "blessing" He wants to give us. For my husband this has all been a long journey for him. I just prayed that the Lord would change his heart. Between our 2nd and 3rd He wanted us to use protection so I submitted to his authority and silently prayed for him. After a while I began to tell the Lord "I know you want this for us, why aren't you changing his heart."
I remember one day I was crying out in my prayer time and all of the sudden an answer came. It was a revelation about my husband and probably most men. God began to show me how I was the problem. It wasn't that my DH didn't want more children it was my attitude. Even though I was staying at home because I chose to, I was buying into the lies around me.

God began to show me that this is my profession, but I was treating it like a hobby. Only doing what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it.

I was always mad about something. Complaining about something the kids had done. The house was always a wreck. Proverbs talks about the "virtuous" woman. That word actually means able. Wow. I want to be seen as ABLE. Able to do all that God has called me to do. If I had been my own employee then I definitely would have fired me or at the very least not given me any more work. The bible says that when you faithful with little you will be given more. No wonder my DH didn't want anymore children. I was not faithful with the little I had already. I was always looking at life only seeing how everything affected me. I was so me focused and it was turning my husband off.

After that I started paying attention to my attitude about everything. I don't want to be the reason we miss out on "blessings". I began to do my best instead of just getting by. I quit listening to excuses about having 2 small children. I quit bemoaning lack of sleep and no me time. I quit holding back and I jumped in to full time giving to my family and it has made a HUGE difference in our life. I started to see just how much Power I have, whether I use it for good or bad is up to me. I quit listening to the lies of this world. I have also been praying for contentment. I know that another reason that my DH doesn't want more children right now is money. We have a 3 bedroom house with 3 kids. I have no problem with kids sharing rooms, but DH is another story. In the last few years I have learned how to be much more frugal with our $. I have learned to be thankful and content with what my DH provides for us. I believe that if we as women will be content and affirm our husbands they will not work themselves to death to try to keep up with everyone around them. I have seen a big difference in my husband since I just let go of my vision of the "American Dream" and just starting loving my life.

I don't want "IT" to be me anymore. I want to be found faithful. Thank you, Lord for showing me me!!!

The Big Sin...

I took my 7mo. old to the Dr. today because He is sick... That goes without saying right?! Not anymore. Maybe I'm the only one, but I usually only take my kids to the DR. when they are sick. We have good insurance so that's not why. I'm just old-fashioned I guess.


Anyway, I'm sitting there with the Dr. telling her my sons symptoms when she looks up from her chart and says "Do you realize I haven't seen him for a check-up?" To which I reply yes I do. She then looks down again and Oh No here it comes, She realizes I'm the "ONE" who doesn't give my kids shots. Wow, I'm in serious trouble now. So, for the hundredth time (seriously) since I became a mother 4 1/2 yrs ago I have to hear a Dr. tell me about immunizations. I left one Dr. already because she just wouldn't stop nagging me about it. I have made up my mind. You don't have to agree with me, but last I checked it is still my choice. I feel like someone is going to call CPS on me every time I go to the DR. This is getting CRAZY... And as for the checkups. I know how He is growing. He is my third I know what developments to look for. If there were a problem I would not hesitate to get him the best care possible, BUT if it ain't broke don't fix it!!!

What do poor people do, what do people do who have 10 kids? I know they can't be taking their kids to the Dr. every time they turn around. What about all of us who grew up never going to the Dr. unless you were dying or something was broken??? I know alot of people disagree with me, but they are MY children, MY choices, and I "thought" my freedom! When they pass a law which I'm sure they will because REALLY it's ALL about $$$ anyway, and I have no choice I will do what they tell me too. But, for now I'm not giving my kids shots for illnesses they don't have and may never have. I will put my hope, trust, and faith in JEHOVAH RAPHA because He is the ONE WHO HEALS.

Feeling Peculiar...

Titus 2:11-14 "For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world; Looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Savior Jesus Christ; Who gave himself for us that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works."

It's one thing to feel peculiar in this world, that's to be expected. Things like modesty, un-family planning, submission to husbands all seem crazy to the world. Putting others first including your family is a mortal sin in this humanistic society. The notion that God is the opener and closer of the womb is barbaric. The idea that ALL life is precious and worthy of our time, energy, and effort is outdated. Picking up your cross, bearing others burdens, sacrifice, service all these commands ignored. We live in a world that says You are your own boss (god). My will be done. My pleasure is the most important thing. My life is about me. I'm gonna get all I can and step on anyone who gets in my way even if it's my spouse, children, or elderly parents. There is no denying the world we live in lives by these very same values. That's nothing new, but what really makes me sad is that as "christians" we have bought into all of this. We no longer follow Christ's example. We've become the like the world. The salt has lost it's flavor. It's sad, but there are few that would follow the whole council. There are a remnant of women sold out to the call of God. I feel a kidred spirit with so many online. I know God is calling us to raise a generation of Peculiar people to bring Honor and Glory to His Name. May we be found worthy. Thank you for sharing your lives with people like me who feel alone even in church. You give me the courage to continue searching for Truth.