3 evidences of Grace.

The Joy dare for day 8 was something about a reflection, shadow, and light. This one was too much of a challenge for me because creativity and thinking out of the box are not my strong points. I'm more of black and white, get to point type of person. Although I can seriously appreciate those who have a vision. The other thing is I'm not very good with a camera. I don't have time to catch any reflections or shadows. So, with all that being said, my realist mind came up with my own three things today. Three times that I received a grace from God's Hand.

Still a baby...

From before I can remember I knew one day I would have a big family. When Bobby and I were dating and we talked about children he was shocked to find out that I wanted a lot of children, but he was convinced that I was the woman God had chosen for him (poor guy). I knew though that if it was God's will it would happen. At the time though I didn't know anything about what the Bible actually said about children. Sadly I just assumed He didn't care one way or another, because when I looked around the Church I didn't see many people who wanted very many. I saw a lot of people who had a couple children. Almost like they had a couple pairs of shoes or 2 designer purses. Something told me that contraception was not for us and that any life that God gave us was up to Him. After 2 little ones in 2 1/2 years I thought we better talk about where we were headed. I mean the Bible does say without a vision the people perish. Bobby and I were NOT on the same page and I really couldn't understand WHY God had given me this conviction that I couldn't shake if He was not gonna give it to Bobby too. After much prayer, a few years, and two more sons we had the conversation again. I had to know where we were going... God had radically changed my husbands convictions and he was now ready to accept any child that God gave us as a gift. SO, I naturally assumed we would get pregnant right away. I'm not like a lot of woman. I LOVE pregnancy, I LOVE babies (even the ones that keep me up at night), I LOVE ones, twos, threes (maybe not), just kidding, but I haven't found an age yet that I wasn't thoroughly in love with. I want a full house. I want a busy house. I'll take it all. My little guy is now 20months old and everyone is saying "when are you going to announce", "we're waiting to hear you're pregnant". All the while people all around me are getting pregnant and having babies all the time. I just knew it would be us before now. BUT, GOD is again teaching Angela a lesson. HE is in control. The GRACE for me is that my little guy is still such a little guy. He is so lovable and huggable. He just wants to sit in my lap and love on me so much. He is jealous of the dogs when I give them attention. He just LOVES mom and loves being with me. I don't know if that is why we are not pregnant yet or if God just made him extra dependent because He knew that I need that. Either way God knows my heart and that I need that. Caleb the son before him was NEVER like that. They were actually less than 2 years apart and He NEVER wants to hug and kiss. He has always been ready to be a big kid. He has always been independent. It never ceases to AMAZE me how God knows us and gives us what we need.

Laughter is the best medicine...

I've mentioned before that my husband is funny. His sense of humor is one of the major things that attracted me to him (not to mention he is extremely handsome ;-). He always has a slight grin on his face that makes you think he's thinking something naughty. I love that about him... Anyway, back to grace... Ok today I was trying to explain to Jo my 7 yr old that you can't start a sentence with "because", and you can't say "um" 3 times when your making a complete sentence. After I got frustrated with her lack of focus and she got frustrated with my lack of teaching skills in comes "knight in Sooners hat" aka Dad. He explains very effectively with a humorous example why and how you answer a question with a complete sentence. He always does that. He just knows how to diffuse a situation with a witty antidote... I love that man for that. I love the Lord for giving me such a beautiful and amazing husband... that is GRACE!!!

Dreams and visions...

After we had been married for a few months I was really starting to get the itch... You know the one "The baby itch". One night I had a vivid dream that I was driving down the road and I looked in the back seat and there was a little girl. My little girl and we were going on a girl's day. We were talking and laughing. I was struck by how intense I wanted that to be true. I missed out on that kind of relationship with my mom (who died when I was 2). The crazy thing is that I was pregnant with a little girl and didn't know it. I forgot all about that dream until tonight. I was walking up to Jordan and all the sudden that vision came back to my mind and I knew that she was that girl. The girl of my dreams. I knew that God was giving me what I had missed out on as a young girl... God is so Good to me.

This dare to find 3 evidences of God's grace each day are really opening my eyes to how intimately my God shows His love for me. Healing this heart one grace at a time!!!

Remind me again...

The wind is blowing today. As I look outside and see the trees blowing in the wind and everything that is not anchored in the ground blowing away, I wish I was one of those trees. I wish that the wind could come and sweep away all my worries and just leave me standing tall. Ever have one of those days when you can't seem to shake the heavies. When you feel like the world is revolving on your shoulders? Some days the weight of responsibility seems too much to bear.

In the midst of all these thoughts the story of the woman at the well came to my mind. Shamefully when I think of that story sometimes and the words that Jesus spoke I roll my eyes and think "yeah right, never thirst again". What is it about us humans that we think life should be trouble free? For me troubles are the very thing that make me run to Jesus. When things are good, when the sun is shining without the cold and wind, I forget about Jesus. Not outwardly. No I still do the right things, but it's just become routine. But, when my heart is troubled then I remember my God. Reminds me of the Israelites. Always forgetting God until troubles come.

Never thirst again... Did Jesus mean that we would never have longing in our soul? No. Did Jesus say we would never yearn? No. When I was having all these thoughts God's Spirit rushed in and spoke to my heart. The other words of Jesus... "We will have trouble in this life." We will have anxious thoughts and we will doubt. Sometimes we will be lonely and scared. Sometimes we will face giants that threaten to destroy us. We have an enemy seeking to devour us. No there is no end the trouble we will face in this life...

Never thirst again. The Lord spoke to me of thirst. You can die of thirst, but there are definitely warning signs before you kill over. Your mouth gets dry first. So, what do you do? Do you just sit there? NO. What about eating something salty? NO. Do you stand at the faucet and stared at it until your thirst goes away? Or do you walk away and just hope that this blasted thirst will just go away if you try not to think about it. Then what happens... you start to have "hunger" pains that you don't realize are from thirst. So, you eat something and realize your even more thirsty than before. After a while you get a headache and then you start to feel light headed and fatigued... After a few days you're so weak you don't even want to raise your head. Eventually thirst can lead death.

It's humorous to me right now as I get this mental image of my spiritual life. Never thirst again... Yes we have the living water, yes he meets our needs, no we don't have to go to something over and over again to quench that thirst, but we have to ABIDE. Jesus said "I am the Vine, you are the branches. If a man ABIDE in me, and I in Him, he will bear much fruit." But we have to abide. W have to live in the Spirit and walk in the Spirit. We have to turn the faucet on.

As if to illustrate this point Jordan just walked up to me and said "Do you have a drink somewhere" and I handed her my drink... The End. Thirst Quenched.

Are you thirsty? Do you roll your eyes when you think about never thirsting again? Do you have sin in your life that separates you from the one who can satisfy you? Have you slipped away and run to other things to satisfy that longing? Do you think boy I sure am thirsty I wish that water would just get on me? Have you just given up and walked away from the faucet? Go back and turn it on and stick your head in. Get a big drink. Jesus can satisfy. We don't have to thirst again, but we have to drink in that living water. I promise you that water is still flowing!

Lord, I am thirsty. I feel dry and brittle. I need that life giving flow. I confess that I have slipped away AGAIN. Draw me to that living water again. I hear the sound of a waterfall in the distance lead me there once again I've lost my way. Thank you that you are the living water and that you will satisfy this thirsty soul once again.

In a bag, in my fridge, and in my heart...

Day 6 of the joy dare... Thanks Sharity and Gayla for the encouragement!!!

In a bag...

After much meditation I FINALLY realized that NOTHING could beat out the gift in a bag that I received from my wonderful brother in love Jason... 3 pairs of fuzzy socks. Soft, comfortable, and extremely cute. Fuzzy socks are not only fun, but fashionable. Just like Jason himself!!!

In my fridge...

This took NO thought... OF COURSE Creamer is the thing in my fridge that brings me the most joy. When you have 2 little ones that get up before the sun breaks on the horizon you NEED something to look forward to. When I hear the words "the light is on outside", I wake up looking forward to a great cup of coffee!!!

In my heart...

Today when all my children ate the oatmeal I had made without complaining I was really happy, but when they each said "thanks mom for making us good food" I was filled with joy. Especially because I know that oatmeal is the last thing they want to see on the breakfast table... It's moments like that that make you stop and think I am doing something right. Thank you, Jesus for helping me along the way to not do the easy thing. Thank you, Lord for showing me in small moments like this that the dedication to train them up in the best possible way (for YOU) is going to pay off someday. Please direct their hearts to worship you and love others as they love themselves!!!!

That's a wrap for day 6... Again I praise God for the small things in life that bring great JOY and for this challenge to really pay attention to the gifts you give!!!

Day 5 of the Joy dare.

Well, it's been a busy day so I'm just now sitting down to reflect on the small things that bring me joy. Today I'm actually doing the 5th day.

Day 5... Something Old, New, and Blue.

Day 5 was a little harder for me. I had to put some thought in it, but when I did I came up with some things that made me stop and really thank the Lord for.

Something old...

A wine decanter and glasses that were my real mother's. Someone saved a few very special and valuable things for me. My mother died when I was about 2. I don't really know a lot about her even though some have tried to give me insight. I think in my heart that we are very much alike, even if it doesn't look like it on the outside. I know we both love my crazy Father, and that's saying something. (hee hee) for those who know my Papi. When I look at this gift it never fails to draw me closer to the one who gave me life. Even if I don't know her I KNOW her and I feel her and that's why this something old is very special to me. She left a deep impression of her love in my heart and for that I am forever thankful.

Something new...

I had to think about this one hard as well too, but when I figured it out I was SURE this is the one new thing that brings me joy!!! MY NEW COMPUTER!!! My old piece of junk was on it's last toe. I came down to get on it one day it would not even turn on. I hadn't been able to use my "lap-top" on my actual lab for 2 years because it had to be plugged up somewhere. Even with high-speed Internet I thought I was using dial-up. Most of the websites I wanted to go to my computer would not connect to. Needless to say It was time to have a funeral service for my dear old computer. That day after I had resolved myself to not having a computer for a while my computer fairy Jen came in and handed me a box with you guessed it a BRAND NEW COMPUTER. OHMYGOONESS I couldn't believe how wonderful this was a new computer what a blessing!!! Thank you Aunt Jen.

Something blue...

Another hard one and another good one!!! I was sitting in my "blue" bathroom trying to be inspired. Blue is my favorite color this shouldn't be hard and there are some beautiful candle holders and other decorations, but nothing that really brought me any joy... And then I looked up and saw the most precious thing that I have that is blue. A picture drawn by my little princess when she was 5. A picture on blue paper. A picture of the two of us playing in wildflowers. I have it framed in a beautiful frame and put it in a special place because I never want anything to happen to and I knew this is my something blue.

These are my special things something old, new and blue. After a moment of reflecting on each one I give praise to my Heavenly Father for the little things that mean so much!!! Each one a reminder of the blessing in my life and the love he's has bestowed on one so unworthy!!!

Joy Dare Cont.

The Joy Dare day 3 is three things overheard.

Being woken up at 6am by my little guy saying "da, da... hot dog, hot dog, hot dog, dog." How can you be mad when you hear something so sweet...

When I asked my 3 yr old for a piece of his candy and he said "You can't have candy, you're an adult." Isn't it so true that you wait your whole life to grow-up and do what you want to do only to find out that you can't just do what you want to.

The last thing that I have overheard that brought joy to my heart was my 6 and 7 year old reading the 95th psalm. "O come, let us sing unto the LORD: let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation. Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving, and make a joyful noise unto him with psalms. For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods." This one is double joyful for me because they are reading God's word for themselves AND because I taught them how to read. I am so thankful that God allows me to be home and that I am able to teach them and be with them all throughout the day. I never have to miss anything wonderful that they do.

The 4th day of the Joy dare was... Something I'm reading, making, or seeing.

Something that I am reading that brings me joy is "The Smart Puppy" it's a dog training book. We just got two puppies for Christmas and I posted something on FB about getting tired of cleaning up poo. One of the ladies at my church responded with advice about dog training and then in a few days we received a book in the mail from Amazon. I thought that was so sweet of her to take the time out to do that for me. Lord knows all a homeschooling mom of 4 needs is to take on the job of training 2 dogs, but now I am armed with some good sound advice... Thank you Darla!!!

Something I am making I'm ashamed to say is my 3yr old's baby book. This brings me a mixture of joy and pain though. Going back and thinking about my warrior has been so bittersweet. My favorite memory of him was when he was first born and we was wide awake and looking around at everything. I could not believe how alert he was. He didn't fall asleep that night until he had been up 6 hours straight. I KNEW then that we were in trouble and I was right. He has been the hardest child along the way, but his sweet moments are the best...

Something I'm seeing... This is a gift that was given to me by my mother in love... It's a "Blessing box" and she wrote a blessing letter to go inside it. When I look at the box I'm reminded of the wonderful friendship that we have. When I need someone to talk to who I know will listen, but still tell me the truth (in love) she is the one. We refer to each other as Ruth and Naomi. We are sojourners in the life and I'm so thankful for our friendship!!!

Well, that wraps up day 3 and 4. I'm trying to get caught up so that I will be on the right day, but I know you're ready for a break... I sure am. Gotta get to work!!!

Catching up on Joy...

Since I came by the Joy dare on the 7 day I decided today I would go back and do the first 6.

Day 1 of the Joy Dare: 3 things about myself I'm thankful for.

The first thing that came to my mind to be thankful for was the faith that God has given me to believe his word. The Bible talks about hearts that are receptive to the message of the Gospel and those that are not. Although this is not a result of anything I have done I am so very thankful that when the Spirit called and continues to call upon my heart it softens and turns to the call. I am thankful that God has given me the faith to believe in Him for my salvation, but also for the faith to believe that His word is the only Truth.

The second thing about myself that I am thankful for is the realization that people are the way they are because of the experiences they have had in this life. Even though sometimes I get frustrated with people I try to look past what they are doing to the why of what they are doing. I heard a long time ago that people respond to life out of hurts that they have experienced in the past. Being able to look past actions to the heart of the person gives you the ability to love them when you may not like what they do.

The third thing that about myself that I am thankful for is my willingness to accept each child as a blessing from God. Even if I may not always think this is the right time or that we can't handle any more I know that God is Sovereign and He knows what He is doing. I know that each child He has brought into our life has blessed us and grown us in ways that nothing else could. We are better people because of the small people that God has given us. No matter what He knows better than we do of what we can handle.

Each one of these things are not something that I have done or come by naturally, but they are the things that I love about myself that God has done in my life in the last 15 years since I became a follower of Christ. They are a result of God's transforming power in my life and I am so thankful that God is completing the work that he started in me so long ago. I'm thankful for the power of God's word to transform a life into something beautiful!!!

The 2nd day of the dare was a gift outside, inside, and on a plate.

Something that always brings me joy outside is a tree. Trees are so amazing to me. When I go on a walk with my children I always look around and I can't help, but be overwhelmed by God's wisdom and imagination. To think that the Great Oak comes from a tiny seed. Trees amaze me because there are so many different kinds. Big trees, small trees, thin leaves, fat leaves, or even bristles. Some bear fruit and some nuts. Some flower and some have cones. Trees are one of those things that lead me to praise God for his creation because no matter where you are you can see them and study their differences.

The thing that brings me joy inside my house is my bedroom. It's a sanctuary, a quiet place, a beautiful place. This is the place I can go away and get quiet and feel the presence of God. No matter what craziness I have experienced throughout the day I know that when I enter that place I can pray and reflect and just chill. It's also a beautiful place because it represents the place where husband and wife can be together uninterrupted.

Right now the thing on a plate that brings me joy is black bean and corn salsa. I know that's probably strange, but that's the thing right now it could change at any time. I like it though because it full of good stuff and I don't feel guilty about eating it. YUM!!! I love that God made food for our body, but he also made it to be enjoyed.

Well, that's the 1st 2 days of the Joy dare and I have to take a break to do other stuff so that's where I will end for now!!! I hope the small things that I wrote will inspire you to find things that bring you joy and make you thankful!!!

Taking the joy dare!!!

I have been longing to be more joyful and I was inspired when I came by this post... Joy is a habit we have to cultivate. A habit must replaced with a new habit. I have the habit of complaining and being less than content so that habit must be replaced with a habit of praise and thanks....

Today being the 7th: 3 graces from people I love.

1. The unconditional love of my daughter who told me last night that I am the best mom ever and she would never want another mom. I know I'm not, but I am so thankful for her love because I have been hard on her and she is the oldest. I didn't really have a clue about being a mother, and most the time still don't, but she loves me anyway. She has taught me how to love more deeply.

2. My husband's sense of humor. He makes me smile when I want to cry and laugh when I would rather be mad. He interjects silliness into any situation. He helps me to see the brighter side of any situation. I'm thankful that He knows how to make me laugh!

3. My Mom's acceptance of hard situations. She has been dealing with lung cancer for the last year and no matter what she had to go through she just did it. She took the punches as they came and did it with so much grace. I respect her so much for fighting this thing and growing so much as a person in the face of the hardships.

These are the 3 people, but there are so many things about so many people that I could choose. I am thankful for all the amazing people that God has so lovingly placed in my life. Once I started looking there was something amazing about every person I know!!! Usually I'm talking about what I don't like... What a change in perspective.