Thursday, January 12, 2012

3 evidences of Grace.

The Joy dare for day 8 was something about a reflection, shadow, and light. This one was too much of a challenge for me because creativity and thinking out of the box are not my strong points. I'm more of black and white, get to point type of person. Although I can seriously appreciate those who have a vision. The other thing is I'm not very good with a camera. I don't have time to catch any reflections or shadows. So, with all that being said, my realist mind came up with my own three things today. Three times that I received a grace from God's Hand.

Still a baby...
From before I can remember I knew one day I would have a big family. When Bobby and I were dating and we talked about children he was shocked to find out that I wanted a lot of children, but he was convinced that I was the woman God had chosen for him (poor guy). I knew though that if it was God's will it would happen. At the time though I didn't know anything about what the Bible actually said about children. Sadly I just assumed He didn't care one way or another, because when I looked around the Church I didn't see many people who wanted very many. I saw a lot of people who had a couple children. Almost like they had a couple pairs of shoes or 2 designer purses. Something told me that contraception was not for us and that any life that God gave us was up to Him. After 2 little ones in 2 1/2 years I thought we better talk about where we were headed. I mean the Bible does say without a vision the people perish. Bobby and I were NOT on the same page and I really couldn't understand WHY God had given me this conviction that I couldn't shake if He was not gonna give it to Bobby too. After much prayer, a few years, and two more sons we had the conversation again. I had to know where we were going... God had radically changed my husbands convictions and he was now ready to accept any child that God gave us as a gift. SO, I naturally assumed we would get pregnant right away. I'm not like a lot of woman. I LOVE pregnancy, I LOVE babies (even the ones that keep me up at night), I LOVE ones, twos, threes (maybe not), just kidding, but I haven't found an age yet that I wasn't thoroughly in love with. I want a full house. I want a busy house. I'll take it all. My little guy is now 20months old and everyone is saying "when are you going to announce", "we're waiting to hear you're pregnant". All the while people all around me are getting pregnant and having babies all the time. I just knew it would be us before now. BUT, GOD is again teaching Angela a lesson. HE is in control. The GRACE for me is that my little guy is still such a little guy. He is so lovable and huggable. He just wants to sit in my lap and love on me so much. He is jealous of the dogs when I give them attention. He just LOVES mom and loves being with me. I don't know if that is why we are not pregnant yet or if God just made him extra dependent because He knew that I need that. Either way God knows my heart and that I need that. Caleb the son before him was NEVER like that. They were actually less than 2 years apart and He NEVER wants to hug and kiss. He has always been ready to be a big kid. He has always been independent. It never ceases to AMAZE me how God knows us and gives us what we need.
Laughter is the best medicine...
I've mentioned before that my husband is funny. His sense of humor is one of the major things that attracted me to him (not to mention he is extremely handsome ;-). He always has a slight grin on his face that makes you think he's thinking something naughty. I love that about him... Anyway, back to grace... Ok today I was trying to explain to Jo my 7 yr old that you can't start a sentence with "because", and you can't say "um" 3 times when your making a complete sentence. After I got frustrated with her lack of focus and she got frustrated with my lack of teaching skills in comes "knight in Sooners hat" aka Dad. He explains very effectively with a humorous example why and how you answer a question with a complete sentence. He always does that. He just knows how to diffuse a situation with a witty antidote... I love that man for that. I love the Lord for giving me such a beautiful and amazing husband... that is GRACE!!!
Dreams and visions...
After we had been married for a few months I was really starting to get the itch... You know the one "The baby itch". One night I had a vivid dream that I was driving down the road and I looked in the back seat and there was a little girl. My little girl and we were going on a girl's day. We were talking and laughing. I was struck by how intense I wanted that to be true. I missed out on that kind of relationship with my mom (who died when I was 2). The crazy thing is that I was pregnant with a little girl and didn't know it. I forgot all about that dream until tonight. I was walking up to Jordan and all the sudden that vision came back to my mind and I knew that she was that girl. The girl of my dreams. I knew that God was giving me what I had missed out on as a young girl... God is so Good to me.
This dare to find 3 evidences of God's grace each day are really opening my eyes to how intimately my God shows His love for me. Healing this heart one grace at a time!!!

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