Friday, September 24, 2010

Crazy, Happy, Love...

Oh, two year old boy...
with your cute chubby cheeks,
and big brown eyes.

You smile is contagious,
but your scream is outrageous...

I love the way you sing at the top of your lungs,
and how you give the biggest of hugs...

You make me so tired I just wanna cry,
but without you I know I would surely die.

I know in the end God will use your strong will,
but for now you just might wanna chill.

This is an Ode to my 3rd born child... A more dilightful soul I may not have met, but He can strike terror into the hearts of his family... He knows every word to every song He has heard. He smiles and laughs at the simplest things, but screams bloody murder if something doesn't go his way. I'm not really sure what to do with him. He has no fear and doesn't care about discipline. He was named after Caleb in the bible. Caleb was a warrior for God who had no fear and stood firm on the promises of God. I can only hope and pray that my Caleb will one day live up to that legacy... C.R.G. May you be a WARRIOR for the LORD!!!

You make me CRAZY, and HAPPY, and I LOVE YOU!!!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Finding Time and believing lies...

Today I was a ranting raving crazy Momma. By the middle of the day I thought I really better get out of here before I messed things up good. Of course I thought it was the kids, or the house, or homeschooling. I was feeling pretty overwhelmed and thinking maybe I was the wrong person for the job. All I could see was a messy house, a crying baby, a screaming toddler and two big kids running around doing nothing productive!!!

The thing is that is the exact opposite of what I want for my life. I truly desire to be all that God wants me to be and I want to do it with a cheerful disposition. I want to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I'm striving to learn and grow and become. I feel like the caterpillar inside the cocoon. Wrestling, twisting, and turning. Wanting to go forward to the new, but feeling so comfortable with the old. When will I become that butterfly???

So, today as I'm "thinking" only negative thoughts about myself and my life I received an email that talked about the enemies mission against a child of God. IF you belong to God then satan has no power over your soul or your eternity, but He does have the power to come against you in other ways. His greatest weapon is discouragement. He whispers those little lies that say you will never make it. You will never become what God wants you to be. You're doing a terrible job so why don't you give up. For me personally the enemy tells me that if I didn't have all these kids or if I didn't home school I would be able to do more. I would have more time if I didn't have so much going on... He tells me I just don't have enough time to do it all... All these negative thoughts all day feeding on my resolve and courage to push on.

After reading the email about thoughts and the enemies attack I "thought" or better yet God whispered to my heart that has been the problem today... I have been believing the lies all day. So, now I need to change my thinking... I need to start thinking on things that are pure and true and right... if there be any virtue or praise think on these things. I need to start listening to the Voice of Truth... because HE says "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." I have to stop believing the lies...

That's not all though God began to show me that I have time for what I want to do. I have time to spend on facebook or email. My time is precious and there isn't a lot of it so I need to really prioritize it. I also need to be more organized and proactive with my time even if that means writing a schedule out and sticking to it throughout the day. BUT, I cannot believe the lie that I don't have enough time in the day. I have to start a task and finish it so that I'm not looking around at a bunch of half done things all day. I know that I will feel more productive and encouraged when I have folded AND put up the laundry or when I have washed/dried AND put up the dishes... BUT, it's TIME to stop feeding on lies. This is my life and I love it. I know that things in the future will be harder even still than where I am now so I must take this time to learn and grow for the future!!!

Lord please help me to see every opportunity to become what you want me to be. Help me to call upon your NAME when I am feeling troubled. Help me listen to you and not my enemy... Thank you Lord for all the work you have done in my life!!! I love you!!!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Love is...

Remember the comic strip "Love Is..." Love was always some action that you could do. I'm sure that they got this from God's Word. I Corinthinians 14... The famous love chapter as I've heard it called.

Love suffers long, and love is kind;
love does not envy,
love does not brag on itself,
love is not arrogant.
Love does not behave itself rudely,
love does not seek it's own way,
love is not easily angered,
and love thinks no evil.
Love does not rejoice in iniquity,
but it rejoices in TRUTH.
Love bears ALL things, endures ALL things,
hopes ALL things.
"Greater Love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13
Real Love is Jesus laying down his life for us. Real love is while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. Real love goes FAR above and beyond what is required. Real love hurts. Real love requires sacrifice and surrender. Love is an action. Love is a decision. Real love is not something you and I are capable on our own. Real love is something that takes lots of practice so we are given lots of opportunities to express Real love.
As a mom and wife I am learning that there is always a choice. Will I love my family this time? What about this time or the next time??? Love is patient, love is kind... Have I been that today? If not then I have not loved. Have I been easily angered? Do I keep records for the wrong done unto me (even by my children)? Then I have not loved!!! I promise they know the difference between when I have loved and when I have not... If we say we have loved God, but do not love others then we have lied... (james)
Love covers a multitude of sins (done to us). The only way we can love like this is with the Spirit of God because... "God is LOVE", but even then love is not something that comes natural to us. We have to cultivate a spirit of love. We have to water it and weed it and grow love strong in our lives. We have to take every opportunity to share love with those around us especially our family. This is our ministry from God as wives. Love is our calling as the of children of God.
All you need is LOVE. Please help me to LOVE like you do Lord, because I'm no good at this. Help me to love beyond what I feel at any given moment!!!

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Growing Weary...

Gal 6:9-10 "And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, IF we faint not. and as we have the opportunity, let us do good unto all men, ESPECIALLY unto them who are of the household of faith."

It's hard to not grow weary sometimes. As I think about all that needs to be done I get overwhelmed. Not just school, laundry, dishes... but more importantly love, compassion, kindness, gentleness, attention... Growing my children up in the faith is a long, hard journey. Especially difficult for me because I have so far to go in this journey myself. Sometimes I get frustrated and tired I know everybody does.

As I was reading this verse I saw something I hadn't seen before... "let us not"... Yeah as with most things this is a choice. I know some circumstances are impossible (not mine), but God says that His grace is sufficient. He has given us everything we need in Christ Jesus through his Spirit to endure and not faint. We can be filled daily with what we need for that day. We can "rejoice, and again I say rejoice", we can have the "joy of the Lord as our strength". BUT, the choice is up to us. I really hate that. I want it all to be easy and for God to do everything for me.

Another thing that really spoke to me about this verse is that is says when I have the opportunity I should "choose" to do well to ALL people, especially to those in the household of faith. Well, for me that "household of faith" are the small people in this household. WoW. I have a lot of opportunities to do well and not grow weary, but how many times do I react in the flesh and not the spirit. How many times do I choose to get frustrated, impatient, unkind... As a mother I have countless opportunities to share the faith with these my disciples. Do I look for times during the day when I can "Do Good"?

Making the choice to not grow weary is a hard one, but we have the promise of God that we will reap in due season those good things we have sewn. We will have the chance one day to see the beautiful fruit growing in our children's lives. Thank you Lord that you have given us all we need in Christ and that you promise to reward us for doing well. Thank you for also showing me that choosing to do well also makes me happy. I'm not really good at this yet, but I pray you will continue to work on me and not grow weary!!!