"My do it, Mommy!" I'm standing over my precious (tongue in cheek), strong-willed 2 yr old, offering to help him, but he wants to do it. He has his toothbrush in one hand and the toothpaste in the other, trying with all his might to squeeze the toothpaste on the toothbrush, but nothing is coming out. I know this battle... I've lived through this a few times before and I know that if I don't let him figure out he can't do it on his own, that this will turn into a power struggle. So, I stand there and wait. I wait longer than I want to and fight every urge to just take it from his little hands. I wait while he has his head down, trying to figure out how to make this work. I wait until he figures out... he can't do this on his own and while I wait the Spirit of the Lord speaks to my heart... He shows me what I look like when I try to do everything on my own. He shows me that there are things that are too hard for me... things that I really need to give to him. There are things that He, as my Father in Heaven, is able to do and wants to do for me, but He waits until I surrender and place them in His able and faithful hands.
One day Jesus and his disciples went into a ship and launched out on the lake and when they sailed out Jesus fell asleep. While they were out on the water a fierce storm came on the lake and the boat began to fill with water, and they were in danger of sinking. After trying as hard as they could to keep the ship from sinking, they came to Jesus and woke him saying "Master, Master, we perish." Then he arose and rebuked the wind and the raging of the water: and they ceased and there was calm.
Do you notice how the disciples were focused on the minors... They were trying to save themselves and the boat from sinking. Jesus was focused on the majors and went straight to the storm and calmed it.
We have to face it, sometimes things are too big for us.
As I read this story this morning I thought about my storm. The last couple of weeks I have had some anxiety about starting school. Last year was HARD. I wanted to quit homeschooling and send my kids to school everyday. I know, because I have prayed about this repeatedly, that this is what is what God desires for our family, but it is nothing like I envisioned in my head, and most days ended with me feeling like a complete failure.
This year I have committed to praying for my homeschool and not relying on my own strength, knowledge and ability. This job is too much for me to do alone. I need help. I need to hand over the toothpaste and let my Father put it on my toothbrush.
Today the Lord reminded me of this verse... "For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect (at peace) with Him." II Chronicles 16:9
and "Commit (roll off onto) your way to the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass." Psalms 37:5
and "In all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct (make smooth) your paths." Prov 3:6
God is my Father. He desires to be actively involved in my life. I either push him away and try to do it all myself, and struggle, OR I can hand my life over to him and rest in his protection, provision, and help.
"God is our refuge and strength, a very present (an abundantly active) help in time of trouble." Psalms 46:1
There are so many verses I could put in here, because the Bible from the beginning to the end is a love letter telling us that God wants to be our loving Father, but I think you get the idea, He wants to be involved in our lives, but He will wait patiently until we hand our lives to him.
Quit being stubborn and just give him the toothpaste already!!!